OyChicago articles

Jeremy Klaben is working to make Chicago brighter (and we could all use more brightness in these dreary winter months). His new restaurant, Brightwok Kitchen, located at 21 E. Adams St., is one of the more unique fast-casual bright spots in the Loop.

Brightwok specializes in flash-wok Asian-inspired stir fry for the health- yet flavor-conscious urban diner. Just picture one of those stir-fry stations you usually find at a food court and take it up several notches with local ingredients, sharp aesthetics and the values-driven approach that has caused the fast-casual restaurant market to explode in recent years. That's Brightwok.

And it's really darn tasty. You can build a bowl with rice, noodles or greens, four veggies, tofu or meat from the Midwest and one of seven homemade sauces. There are also fun sides and a variety of teas and coffee for those looking to make themselves at home.

A native of Dayton, Klaben came to Chicago after graduating from the University of Michigan's Ross School of Business and took an internship with Lettuce Entertain You. There he met his partner, Chef Kolter Livengood, and the two opened Brightwok this past summer.

Klaben has also been engaged in Jewish life everywhere he's been, including as a regional leader with BBYO (KIO), a counselor at Goldman Union Camp Institute and U of M Hillel. So he's a bright guy -- and a Jew You Should Know.

1. What inspired you to go into the fast-casual restaurant business, and why stir fry?

I wanted to be on my feet every day and I wanted to have the opportunity to make people happy. I definitely can appreciate larger and fancier restaurants, but I wanted to create something affordable and casual, which is why I chose to open a fast-casual spot. Besides loving stir fry and growing up having my birthday party at my favorite Chinese restaurant, I saw that my friends and I wanted more vegetables in our diet but we didn't want to give up flavor. Stir fry can be healthy and can be addictively delicious.

2. Why is it important to you to emphasize community values in your restaurant? And what led you to pick "brightness" as a theme?

For most decisions we've made so far, we just go back to our core vision: To create a welcoming place that our guests can feel a part of. It's that simple. Do we just have take-out bowls or do we have actual dining ware? Dining ware, so we can create a more relaxed and special environment, etc. The word "bright" has a lot of wonderful connotations and after days of thinking of our perfect name about two years ago, we fell in love with Brightwok. It fits right in with our community-focused, passionate and positive culture that we work very hard to build at BWK.

Photo by Toshi Fujimura

3. The physical kitchen itself has a lot of cool features. What was the concept and process behind the interior design and décor?

We wanted to create a welcoming and hip space that fit with what we're all about. It was our goal to have our guests feel welcome when they enter and dine with us, so we ensured we'd have many tables and six-tops for larger groups. At Brightwok, we stand for a few things: high quality food and diverse and passionate people. We knew this years ago, and so when we met Newman, our designer, we focused on a very minimal, clean, and bright look. The colors of the space are just black, grey and white, which allows the food and the people to bring the true energy to the space. Another quick example is the large bench in the middle of the room that was hand-made by our designer. It's a wooden bench that allows guests to face the energy of the kitchen and energy of the dining room. This, once again, goes back to our vision and our core values. We're all about our food and the people.

4. What lessons have you learned so far as a restaurant/business owner?

This is definitely a loaded question. I'm learning big and small things every day. Most importantly, I'm learning how to be a better leader and manager. We have 19 people on our team right now and I'm very impressed by many of them. They care so much about our business and they work incredibly hard to make our restaurant as great as it can be. Learning how to hold everyone accountable to the same expectations is tough and I've definitely been learning from my mistakes here.

5. What advice do you have for entrepreneurs looking to come up with the next great idea in Chicago?

Go learn from others and take your time. There's no rush to build something truly special. My favorite quote is this one from Sergey Brin, co-founder of Google: "We knew that Google was going to get better every single day as we worked on it, and we knew that sooner or later, everyone was going to try it. So our feeling was that the later you tried it, the better it was for us because we'd make a better impression with better technology. So we were never in a big hurry to get you to use it today. Tomorrow would be better."

6. Where are your other favorite places to get food in Chicago?

DMK Burger Bar, Intelligentsia Logan Square, Crisp.

7. What are your future hopes and plans for Brightwok both from the business side and in terms of community involvement?

My plans are to continue to serve healthy and delicious food in a charming and fun way to more and more people. We will build a sustainable organization that doesn't rely on one or two people, but instead upon numerous leaders of our team. In terms of community involvement, we're already starting to ramp up our engagement by hosting events at BWK such as cooking classes and yoga along with going outside of our four walls to be a part of farmers markets and music festivals next summer. I've always been a person to bring people together and I do hope that more and more folks will see Brightwok as a place to hang out, meet friends, do work and let loose.

8. What's your favorite Jewish thing to do (or how do you Jew?) in Chicago?

Besides going to Milt's with some old college friends … I think the coolest thing about Chicago is that it's big enough that there are always more and more Jews to meet but also small enough that I see old Jewish friends all the time at events and at the bars. For an Ohioan, Chicago has brought together Jewish connections I made in BBYO, best friends from Goldman Union Camp Institute and college classmates from the University of Michigan that I'd have Shabbat dinners with at the U of M Hillel.

Star Wars is kind of its own religion, so at times you might find your Jewish practice conflicts with your nerdy-ness, such as on Friday, when The Force Awakens comes out and continues the story of our people--err--of Star Wars. Here are 18 ways you can bring the Force into your Shabbat.

1. Kindle the lightsabers of Shabbat

2. Braid challah like Princess Leia's hair

3. Have Master Yoda tell a story

4. Rock a Star Wars kippah

5. Eat Star Wars-themed foods

6. Watch the original movies

7. Take a moment to honor thy father

8. Go to synagogue

9. Practice Jedi mindfulness, like Star Wars yoga

10. Play the game "Yoda or Jewish sage?"

11. Think of ways you can be a Force for Change and join the campaign

12. Watch Spaceballs

13. Bake chocolate chip Wookies

14. Do a Star Wars art project with a youngling

15. Work on your Jedi mind tricks

16. Visit a planet in the Star Wars galaxy … on Earth

17. Lightsaber Havdalah!!

18. Tell a Star Wars fan you appreciate them

Jewish young adult events are one of the best ways to meet people in Chicago, but getting the most out of them is a true art form. There can be anywhere from a dozen to hundreds of people, and you never know who might show up.

With YLD's Big Event Fundraiser -- one of, if not the largest, annual Jewish young adult events in Chicago -- just around the corner, we thought we'd offer some tips on how to walk away a winner, whether you're looking to make a romantic connection, or a professional one.

Do: Prep your personal elevator pitch

You'll be introducing yourself a lot and no one has time for a lecture, so get your spiel locked down. You also don't want to accidentally confess your existential quarter life crisis just because someone asks, "so what do you do in life?"

Don't: Talk only about yourself

Calm down there, big macher. If you don't give the people you meet a chance to say enough about themselves, you won't have a chance to find out what you have in common or how you might benefit from building a relationship with them.

Do: Go with a friend

Remember how your parents used to sign you up for new things with a friend? Well, listen to your inner Jewish mother. In these treacherous social waters, you definitely need a swim buddy.

Don't: Just talk to your squad

You can and should bring your whole crew, but you don't need to go to a swanky bar and drop major gelt just to talk to your friends. Get out there and meet people!

Do: Use social and dating apps as a cheat sheet

If you've never thought to yourself, Oh, I recognize that person from [name of dating site/app you're using], you've never been to a Jewish young adult event before. Congrats! Don't let that catch you off guard. Use your apps (preferably beforehand) to better direct your time and energy, or to avoid wasting it.

Don't: Expect not to see anyone you know

Your days of showing up at a bar or social gathering and seeing no one you know are over. You want to be anonymous? Move to Arkansas. Time to embrace who you are and not be ashamed of who you were.

Do: Eat something ahead of time

Even if your event provides food, the last thing you want to do is be the person hovering over the snack table wolfing down mini hotdogs because you haven't eaten all day.

Don't: Take more alcohol than you're entitled to

At these events, "getting your money's worth" is about how many new connections you make; it's not a contest to see how many bottles of wine you can swipe and down before the open bar ends. Nobody's impressed.

Do: Bring business cards

You're a grownup now, get a business card or something with your name and email on it. This is also very handy for giving out your contact information to people you might want to "connect with later" … professionally, of course.

Don't: Bring a bag of your stuff

You should not only avoid bringing your emotional baggage to a young adult event, but also your actual baggage. There is nowhere for you to store your work bag, gym bag or any bag, especially at a bar night. Plan accordingly.

Do: Wear your name tag

If your event has name tags, wear yours. And proudly too, near your face -- you're not a teenager anymore. Also, if someone who should know your name peeks at it, forgive them. This is your new chance to make a more memorable impression on them.

Don't: Make stuff up about yourself

You know that person you just met? They know someone who knows you. There's no getting away with that stuff. Pretend this is high school and word travels fast. (Heck, half the people you went to high school with are probably at this event anyway.)

Do: Be nice to the staff

If it wasn't for the people who organized this event, you would home on the couch watching Netflix and bemoaning your social life. Treat them well, and maybe even get to know them; they're more well-connected than probably anyone else at the event.

Don't: Use pickup lines, especially bad Jewish ones

No one wants to come with you to the Promised Land.

Do: Check your teeth

There are times checking your teeth a lot borders on paranoia, but an event where you're meeting new people and making an impression is not one of them. Compulsive teeth-checking is definitely understandable, especially if you didn't eat ahead of time ...

Don't: Get really drunk

Please just don't. You're an adult; if you need to get wasted you can do it much more cheaply and not in front of dozens of people you know and dozens more people who know people you know. It also reflects poorly on the organization or group that hosted the event, and that's just rude.

Do: Make a getaway plan

Know exactly how you plan to get home, and set a time to check-in with a friend about leaving. It can be hard to determine when enough is enough, and you don't want to get caught in an awkward situation.

Don't: Wait until the day of the event to register

Something better will not come up, so be an adult and commit to something. You don't want to deal with the hassle of waiting at the door and paying more money, or finding that online registration closed. Be the trendsetter and take control of your social life!

Speaking of registering ahead of time, you should sign up for YLD's Big Event Fundraiser featuring comedian Hannibal Buress on 12/12/15!

The lunch salad is a staple of so many people's work weeks, and now, downtown Chicago commuters have a lunch salad they truly "Be Leaf" in.

Be Leaf, which opened this summer at 29 N. Wacker Drive, brings Loop leaf-eaters a fresh, locally sourced and environmentally conscious option among the city's myriad salad bar-style lunch stops. And the woman behind it all is Becky Marks, a definite Jew You Should Know.

For three and a half years, Marks worked at the Jewish United Fund in a fundraising capacity until she was ready to take her analytical and relationship-building skills with her on her own adventure. Following in the footsteps of her brother, creator of Chicago's Emporium arcade bars, Marks wanted to open her own hospitality business, and saw a need in the Midwest for a salad restaurant emphasizing fresh, local produce.

Working alongside consulting Chef Martin Cabrera (Spago, Charlie Trotters, Naansense), Marks built a chef-designed menu of salads, bowls and wraps focused on the ingredients and emphasizing seasonal offerings. Diners can order a designed salad or build their own from an extensive ingredient list and top it off with house-made dressings like avocado cucumber cilantro and ginger lemon sriracha.

Marks also takes great pride in Be Leaf's environmental sustainability efforts. The restaurant composts all its food waste and uses only compostable disposables, in addition to sourcing locally to reduce the carbon footprint of their products. Tasty - and menschy!

1. What inspired you to go into food service? Why salads?

I felt that Chicago had a real market for this concept. People want to eat healthy and also want to be able to have access to fresh produce. These concepts are on the east and west coasts and we do not have them in Chicago, or the Midwest really. I wanted to open my own business and felt this was something that there was really a market for.I love working with people and I love providing where I feel there is a need and this blended the two together.

2. What have you done to make Be Leaf stand out from the many places offering salads or custom salads?

We really focus on minimizing our environmental impact. We compost all of our food waste and only use compostable disposables. We also try to source our produce locally when possible. We focus on getting the freshest produce possible and get daily deliveries and I believe (beleaf) that is evident in the taste! I think the atmosphere is a fun place to be and is different than the other options in the loop. It is playful and also a nice break from the hectic work day with the colors and greenery. My staff is incredibly upbeat and really excited to make your day better!

3. How is Be Leaf representative of your personal values? Which parts of the business are you most passionate about?

I am very passionate about the sustainability. Restaurants can be incredibly draining on the environment and I am trying to do it as responsibly as possible. I also love being able to help educate my customers and staff on sustainability, local sourcing and the carbon footprints of products. I am also very passionate about providing employment for so many people and hope to be able to only grow those opportunities as the business grows. I love my employees and love the input they provide and the collaborative environment we have created.

4. What lessons have you learned so far as a restaurant/business owner?

So many! Every day I am learning, it is so much work and so rewarding. I am learning how to manage employees, how to manage expenses, how to work with customers … I am learning marketing, accounting, delegating ... I could go on forever. It has just been an incredible learning experience. I think the biggest lesson I have learned is to listen to everyone's advice and know that I do not need to take it, but it is important to always listen.

5. What's your favorite salad to make at home or for others when you're not at work? What tips do you have for others to up their salad game?

To be honest I do not make salad that much at home - I have a ton of allergies that limit what I can eat. My advice to up ones salad game would be to eat things when they are in season. It is less expensive and tastier! A quick Google search can let you know what fruits and veggies are in season when. I also would encourage people to make their own dressings! It can be super simple to whip up a fun vinaigrette and it tastes so much better than the store-bought ones.

6. If all goes well, what are your future hopes and plans for Be Leaf and for yourself in the industry?

I hope to expand Be Leaf throughout the Chicago area and also throughout the Midwest. I can see the concept doing really well in college towns and would love to bring healthy and sustainable eating to different parts of the Midwest where it is not as accessible.

7. In what ways, if any, have you been able to apply the skills you developed as a Jewish professional to your work?

My work as a Jewish professional has been invaluable in dealing with customers. Fundraising/working with donors taught me so much about customer service and how to work with people and that is a skill that can be translated to so many different things, especially the restaurant industry. An angry donor isn't that different than an angry diner …

8. What's your favorite Jewish thing to do (or how do you Jew?) in Chicago?

My favorite Jewish thing to do is to have Shabbat dinner with my friends. Lately, I have been in charge of bringing the salad …

^{Photo credit: Mark Seliger}

Back in the 1980s, I grew up on a steady diet of my favorite TV show, the sitcom Family Ties.

I'd imagine what it would be like to be the fifth Keaton child. Don't get me wrong--I loved my own family ties. Still, I dreamed of being the long-lost sister on the show where you could solve a squabble with a sibling or a parent in the Keaton kitchen over hugs, laughs, and orange juice in 22 minutes flat. I envisioned myself knocking on the door to their Ohio home alongside sweet, awkward neighbor Skippy Handelman.

Most of all, I had a ginormous crush on Emmy Award-winning Michael J. Fox, my all-time favorite actor, who, playing the lovable conservative, Wall Street-obsessed genius Alex P. Keaton, somehow made America fall in love with him despite his Gordon Gekko-like tendencies.

Then, Alex and I both grew up--and Fox evolved from teen heartthrob into courageous humanitarian and activist. He will share his inspiring journey with the Chicago Jewish community when he headlines JUF's Vanguard Dinner on Thursday, Nov. 5.

And quite a journey it's been for the star. Back in 1991, at just 29 and amidst a red hot acting career, Fox was diagnosed with young-onset Parkinson's disease--a chronic degenerative neurological movement disorder. In order to come to terms with the illness, Fox waited to go public with his diagnosis for seven years.

The Canadian native became famous and beloved in roles including Alex Keaton, Marty McFly in the Back to the Future trilogy, and Deputy Mayor Mike Flaherty on Spin City. Today, Fox has become equally well-known, respected, and loved for this subsequent chapter in his life as a champion for patients with Parkinson's disease--and a hero to many of us.

In 2000, he launched The Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research, the largest nonprofit funder of Parkinson's drug development in the world--which has raised $450 million to date. Fox, at the helm of the Foundation, has galvanized the search for a cure to the disease that currently affects at least an estimated one million people in the United States and five million people worldwide.

(See details below about how the Center for Jewish Genetics and other JUF-affiliated agencies are meeting the challenges of Parkinson's disease.)

Fox has transformed his obstacles into something beautiful. He calls his struggle with Parkinson's "a gift," approaching life and his illness with the serenity and boundless optimism he writes about in his three books:  Lucky Man, his memoir; Always Looking Up: The Adventures of the Incurable Optimist; and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Future, his compendium of wisdom for graduates.

Real life imitated the small screen when Fox fell in love with Tracy Pollan, the Jewish actress who portrayed Alex's girlfriend, Ellen, on Family Ties. The couple has been married for 27 years and has four children--who have all celebrated their bar and bat mitzvahs--a 26-year-old son, 20-year-old twin daughters, and a daughter who turns 14 in November.

In recent years, Fox has reemerged as a TV star. On The Good Wife, he currently plays a recurring role as Louis Canning, the funny, yet manipulative attorney who suffers from tardive dyskinesia, a neurological condition that causes erratic body movements.

Fox recently sat down with me for a phone interview--a profound conversation--where we talked about acting for him then and now, his real-life family ties, and how we can all face life, including our struggles, with grace, courage, and optimism.

JUF News: How has your journey with Parkinson's disease been, as you put it, "a gift"?

Michael J. Fox: I always qualify it as saying it's the gift that keeps on taking. It's a gift for me because my life was on a path that had gotten ahead of me... After the diagnosis, all of a sudden I couldn't [continue] on that path anymore and I had to find my own path. It had been an easy path of success and privilege and all the blessings that I had. This new path was much more challenging, but by facing it…I realized I had the strength [to cope] and I had people around me who loved me. I had insight to gain from it…over the course of a few years, it all added up to make me a much better person than I had ever thought I could be.

How can all of us use our hardships as a gift in life?

If you deal with the truth. And in my case my diagnosis was the truth--I had Parkinson's--but it took me a long time to accept it. Until you accept it, you're not going to get anywhere. And by acceptance, I don't mean resignation necessarily, but I accept that I'm there and I look at the truth of being there, and then I can cope with everything else. Then [your struggle] only takes up the size it takes up--not this amorphous blob of dread that's floating all through every corner of your life. I have Parkinson's, but I have my family, I have my job, I have my friends, I have my beliefs, I have my ethics--and that doesn't change. The only way it can change is if I let one fact of my life--Parkinson's--become the central fact of my life, which it shouldn't be. But if I make it the central fact of my life, it's going to affect every other area.

Do you ever have moments of weakness where instead of "looking up"--as your book title says--you look down? And when you're going through a hard time, what are your coping tools to get you back to looking up?

I get a little bummed when I have trouble walking sometimes. I don't mind tremoring as much because I can deal with that with medication. But having a hard time walking and losing my balance is tricky for me because I was always very athletic and had great balance--so it was a real loss for me. More than anything else, I worried about how it looked to not be able to walk that well. And it only happened sometimes, but [then] I got a walking stick. And I realized we have to forget vanity because vanity screws us up--how we think we look and how we think we're perceived is not that important. If you need a stick, use a stick; if you need to walk sideways, walk sideways. It doesn't matter how it looks--it just matters that you get where you're going and get done what you want to get done. When I get depressed, it doesn't take long for the truth and other aspects of my life to lighten up the darkness.

How is acting different for you since you returned to the screen after your Parkinson's diagnosis?

I was always the kind of actor who brought a lot of expression, a lot of inflection, a lot of movement, a lot of action, and a lot of energy. Now I find I have to be quieter and more still. There is an expression I used to use when I talked about my diagnosis. I would say, 'I couldn't be still until I couldn't be still.' That's the same kind of thing with acting--I found a stillness, a quiet strength in the way I have to work now because I can't depend on a lot of trickery, on a quick shuffle of my feet, or on my energy. I have to depend on a deeper, quieter energy. It's a lot of fun. I enjoy acting as much now and I love this role [on The Good Wife].

After 25 years of reflection, what are your most lasting memories of Family Ties?

I have great memories of the cast and the show. It was a special [group] of people and I'm still friends with all of them. But Gary David Goldberg, the [late] creator of Family Ties, was my mentor. We used to get together every Friday after the show before we moved on to the cast party or whatever else was going on. We would take an hour after the taping was finished and we'd go have dinner at a local restaurant near the studio. We would sit there and drink wine and talk about how lucky we were and how we jumped lives: He was a poor kid from Brooklyn, I was a poor kid from Canada, and how we ended up on a sound stage in Los Angeles. We would talk about how amazing it was and how grateful we were and I always kept that. When Gary passed away, the one word I kept thinking of was gratitude--gratitude that I knew him and gratitude that we shared with each other.

Who is another hero of yours?

My [older] brother, Steve. His first son, who is now in his 30s, was born with spina bifida and cerebral palsy…He has a lot of challenges, but he is a wonderful kid and my brother and his wife have been so patient raising him. They're so loving and accepting and brave and tireless and just solid. I learn so much from them about dealing with adversity, and [recognizing] the blessings in life and that there is always something important and special that can be found in any situation.

What are the secrets to a happy marriage after 27 years with Tracy?

It's really friendship and acceptance. Romance is great…but it's really about on a day-to-day basis…that we'll trust each other and accept each other. We'll agree not to be territorial and not to look at disagreements and problems as any more than just part of the process. It's about just knowing that that person has your back and I trust Tracy more than I trust anyone else in the world. She's my best friend and she's been through all this stuff with me and I've been through all her stuff with her. We accept and we love and we carry on.

If you had one piece of advice from your journey through life to give to your younger self or to your children, what would it be?

Believe in your dreams but don't be limited by your dreams. Your dreams [are within] the extent of your imagining, but things happen beyond the extent of your imagining and you must be open to those too.

The JUF Vanguard Dinner, to be held at the Hyatt Regency Chicago on Thursday, Nov. 5, requires a $100 couvert per person and a minimum gift of $5,000 to the 2016 Annual Campaign. Diane & Steve Miller are 2016 Vanguard Chairs; Erica & Michael Fishman and Devra & Gregg Shutan are 2016 Vanguard Vice Chairs; and Harry J. Seigle is the 2016 General Campaign Chair. For more information, visit www.juf.org/vanguard or contact Patti Frazin at (312) 357-4878 or Vanguard@juf.org.

The Chicago Jewish community rises to meet challenge of Parkinson's disease

Several JUF affiliated agencies provide programming and services related to Parkinson's disease (PD). About 10 percent of Parkinson's disease is genetic, and the Michael J. Fox Foundation (MJFF) for Parkinson's Research is currently sponsoring a landmark study at 33 clinics worldwide. The Center for Jewish Genetics will collaborate with MJFF to help identify local candidates for this study through a Family Health History month initiative in November, and will also collaborate with MJFF to present "What's Jewish About Parkinson's?" next spring to discuss connections between Jewish heritage and PD.

JCC  was recently selected by the National Parkinson's Foundation to launch the Edmond J. Safra National Parkinson's Wellness Initiative in partnership with Northwestern University School of Medicine and CJE SeniorLife. The program's first cohort will begin in January 2016 at the Bernard Horwich JCC.

CJE SeniorLife provides support for individuals and families affected by PD in order to promote positive healthier lives; CJE has previously collaborated with MJFF on local educational and screening programs examining Parkinson's as a Jewish genetic disease.

An article will feature the collaboration in the November issue of JUF News.

For more information on the study, visit www.michaeljfox.org/ppmigenetics.

Hebrew school brings back a lot of memories. Unfortunately, a lot of those memories involved nagging our parents not to go. You could be a rabbi now, and chances are you still dreaded going to Hebrew school. Oy!Chicago is looking for guest writers of all experience levels to contribute to our next special blog series, "Hebrew School Horror Stories," a collection of first-person stories recalling the hardships of growing up Jewish.

You could share a memory of a particularly trying time in your Jewish upbringing, whether actually in Hebrew school, preparing for your bar/bat mitzvah or any time of Jewish learning. Maybe you have been a Jewish teacher and want to share a "nightmare" from that perspective. Whatever your idea, we want to help you get published!

To pitch your idea, write a paragraph describing what your piece would be about and send it to info@oychicago.com by Tuesday, Oct 6. Please keep in mind that due to the holidays, you may not hear back from us until then.

IMPORTANT: Oy!Chicago will not publish anything hurtful toward or overly critical of an individual, synagogue, Jewish school or organization. If you have any questions or concerns about your idea, please don't hesitate to ask us at info@oychicago.com.

The only other requirements are that the post should in some way relate to the theme, and that you are 21 or older. We will review your submission and let you know if we are interested in working with you and running your piece in the series, which will run Oct. 19-23.

Please note that Oy!Chicago is a volunteer-staffed website, so we are unable to pay for published submissions at this time.

Thanks for your interest!

Stef & Steven

Short days and crisp nights herald the holiday season. I am always excited this time of year. The lighter fare of the summer is over and I crave heartier flavors.

I find that many home cooks struggle with writing their holiday menus. Actually, what I hear over and over again is that they have the "mains" covered but struggle with the sides. I get it. You love Bubbe's brisket/chicken etc. -- but I am not your Bubbe and while my brisket recipe is solid, delicious, and amazing, it is not part of your tradition. But, perhaps you can be tempted by my unique side dishes and bonus dessert?

No problem. I got you covered! My action plan starts with multi-purpose root vegetables. This year I am going wild in the kitchen with carrots.

Carrots are versatile, healthy, and not just for salads. I recommend you purchase the best, locally grown carrots you can find. Since we are elevating the common carrot to recipes in uncommon ways, I recommend you seek out the heirloom purple and yellow carrots. They are delicious and gorgeous.

Food fact: Before the 17th century, all carrots were purple. The purple carrots actually have an added bonus of container anthocyanin, a powerful health boosting flavonoid.

New Year holiday bonus: The Yiddish word "meren" means both carrots and to increase. Carrots symbolize our hope that our merits increase. So, eat up!

I have utilized simple ingredients and many of the ingredients are used several times throughout the recipes. That means less schlepping and more enjoying.

For your holiday pleasure, here are some delicious side dishes to go with Bubbe's favorite brisket, chicken, fish, and any holiday recipe. Shanah Tovah U'Metuka!

Chilled Carrot Soup
Serves 4

3 medium carrots
2 ½ cups fresh carrot juice (either home juiced or purchased)
1 teaspoon honey
¼ teaspoon curry powder
½ teaspoon freshly grated ginger
½ cup coconut milk
Kosher salt and freshly cracked pepper
Suggested garnishes: carrot ribbons, fresh herbs, candied ginger, diced beets

Carrot Puree with Spiced Pumpkin Seed Brittle

2 cups small diced carrots
2 cups small peeled and diced butternut squash
1 cup peeled and diced Yukon Gold potatoes
3 cups chicken stock or water
2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 teaspoon freshly cracked pepper

For the brittle

1 teaspoon vegetable oil, plus additional for coating
4 ounces shelled pumpkin seeds (these are the green ones also called "pepitas")
¼ teaspoon cayenne pepper
¼ teaspoon ground cinnamon
½ teaspoon kosher salt
12 ounces granulated sugar
6 ounces water

1. Place the oil and seeds into a 10-inch sauté pan and set over medium-high heat. Toast the seeds while constantly moving the pan. You will smell their aroma and hear some of them begin to crackle when they are toasted, 4 to 5 minutes. Transfer the seeds to a small mixing bowl, add the cayenne, cinnamon, and salt and stir to combine.

2. Place a large heavy gauge saucepan over high heat. Add the sugar and water to the saucepan, and cook over high heat, stirring occasionally with a wooden spoon, until it comes to a boil. Stop stirring, cover, and cook for 3 minutes. Uncover, reduce heat to medium, and cook until the sugar is a light amber color, approximately 25 minutes.

3. Remove from the heat and stir in the pumpkin seed mixture. This will greatly reduce the temperature of the sugar, so work quickly. Once evenly mixed, pour the mixture onto the prepared half sheet pan. Using an oiled spatula, spread thin. Cool completely, approximately 30 minutes, and then break into pieces. Store in an airtight container for up to 2 weeks.

Savory Roasted Carrots with Apple-Date Chutney

I like to use a mix of colorful carrots for this delicious side. I try to purchase small to medium sized carrots for this dish. I like to leave them whole for a WOW factor when presented on a platter and lavishly dolloped with the chutney.

Serves 6

12 medium carrots, tops cut off
¼ cup best quality extra virgin olive oil
1 teaspoon kosher salt
½ teaspoon freshly cracked black pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

1. On a parchment lined sheet pan, toss the carrots with the oil, salt, and pepper. Place the carrots in the oven and roast for about 20 minutes until lightly browned and tender.

For the chutney

3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
2 shallots, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced
3 apples (I prefer Honey Crisp), cored, but not peeled and cut into medium dice
½ cup sliced pitted dates
2 tablespoons brown sugar
¼ cup red wine vinegar
½ teaspoon cinnamon
½ teaspoon kosher salt
¼ teaspoon freshly cracked black pepper
Garnish: pomegranate arils (seeds)

1. Heat the oil in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Add the shallots and cook until lightly browned. Add the garlic and apples and continue cooking, stirring occasionally until the apples begin to soften, about 5 minutes.

2. Add the remaining ingredients and cook until the dates have softened and plumped and the mixture is holding together.

3. Dollop the chutney on top of the carrots and garnish with pomegranate arils.

Carrot-Coconut Cake

Take a break from the usual honey cake and try this delicious carrot cake... Bubbe would approve!

2 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons baking soda
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
¾ teaspoon kosher salt
3 cups grated carrots, about 9 carrots (you can grate the carrots in a food processor fitted with a shredding blade)
1 cup coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans (Optional)
1 cup shredded coconut, sweetened or unsweetened
½ cup raisins (I prefer golden)
2 cups granulated sugar
1 cup canola
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
4 large eggs

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees.

1. Grease and flour three 9-inch round, 2-inch deep cake pans, flour the insides and tap out the excess.

2. Whisk together the dry ingredients and set aside. In another bowl, stir together the carrots, chopped nuts, coconut, and raisins.

3. Working in a mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, or in a large bowl with a whisk, beat the sugar, oil and vanilla together until smooth and the sugar is fairly dissolved (you shouldn't hear it rub against the side of the bowl). Add the eggs one at a time and continue to beat until the batter is smooth.

4. Add the dry ingredients and mix only until they are combined. Don't over mix or the cake will be tough.

5. Add the carrot mixture and fold it in gently.

6. Divide the batter among the baking pans and slide the pans into the oven. Bake the cakes for 40 to 50 minutes, rotating the pans top to bottom and front to back at the midway point. The cakes are properly baked when a knife inserted into the centers of the cakes comes out clean; the cakes will just start to come away from the edges.

7. Transfer the pans to cooling racks, cool for 5 minutes, then turn out onto racks to cool to room temperature. (The layers can be wrapped airtight and kept at room temperature overnight or frozen for up to 2 months; thaw before frosting.)

Creamy Coconut Frosting

This frosting is a departure from the usual cream cheese frosting. It is creamy, light, delicious, and pareve! Just whip the ingredients at high speed until light and fluffy.

3 tablespoons coconut oil, softened at room temperature
1 ½ cups sifted powdered sugar
2 tablespoons coconut yogurt
½ teaspoon vanilla extract
⅛ teaspoon sea salt

Laura Frankel is a noted kosher chef and owner of Pickled Tongue Catering and Foods. "Her book Jewish Slow Cooker Recipes: 120 Holiday and Everyday Dishes Made Easy" was recently released in paperback. Check out her website at www.cheflauraskosher.com.

God recently spoke to Rabbi Charlie Schwartz. Which is weird, because he doesn't believe in a God that has a voice.

But the experience was so unexpected, and so meaningful, that he shared an ELI Talk about it and the lessons he walked away with this past June in Chicago. You can see that talk now, here:

I was curious about this educator-technologist, so I reached out for an interview. Turns out he had a lot more wit and wisdom to share -- and he is definitely a Jew You Should Know.

When did you know you wanted to become a rabbi?
I actually shadowed my rabbi when I was in 7th grade as part of a school career project so already then the idea of becoming a rabbi was a strong part of my identity. Although I sometimes shy away from the word, being a rabbi does feel like a "calling" for me.

Name one new technology that excites you and why.
I've become enamored with hackable/programmable micro-computers like Arduino and Raspberry Pi. These super small, cheap computers make it relatively easy to tinker around with hardware and create some compelling interactive projects that wed the digital with the physical. This summer at Genesis (one of the programs I run at Brandeis University) my partner in all things tech-related, Russel Neiss, and I will be running a course teaching high school students to use these micro-computers and giving them the project of using this tech to hack a Jewish ritual. 

You spent time serving in the Israeli Defense Forces. What surprised you about that experience?
Serving in a basic infantry unit from 2003-2005 I was constantly surprised by all the small details of the IDF, like the special way to tie your boots, that headset radios are called Madannot because they look like the mics Madonna used in the 80s, that the camouflage head coverings are named after the headdress of the High Priest (mitznefet), and how much chocolate an average 18-year-old Israeli soldier can consume in one sitting.

You're originally from Portland, so … do you watch Portlandia? Is the dream of the '90s really still alive?!
Most items I own have a bird on them and I only eat meat I'm on a first name basis with so it's less that I watch Portlandia and more that I live it. As for the dream of the '90s, I think the secret to keeping the dream alive is a vibrant urban core, low cost of living, and diverse neighborhoods ... not sure how well Portland fits that dream but Chicago on the other hand …

Through Brandeis you teach teens; what have the teens taught you?
Teens are constantly teaching me new things; a Talmudic text I've never seen, innovations in design and technology, creative ways to look at a problem, but in the most general terms teens are continually teaching me what passion looks like.

I hear you have a sousaphone. Do you play, or is there another story there?
I do play! I grew up playing tuba in symphonic bands and orchestras and as a wedding gift my brothers bought my wife and me our sousaphone (making it our marital sousaphone). It has become kind of a totem for our family appearing in many many pictures. I also play in The Second Line Social Aid and Pleasure Society Brass Band, an activist New Orleans-style street band in Somerville, Mass.

ELI Talks

In your ELI talk, you're not addressing education or technology, but a very personal idea about God. What led you to share that story?
I see technology and to a lesser extent education as tools used to achieve goals. While I love talking about technology and its impact on the field of education, at the end of the day, that's not what drives me as a rabbi, an educator or a Jew. Larger ideas about how we might experience God and our responsibility to the local and global community are at the heart of what I do and teach, so that's what I thought I'd talk about for my ELI Talk.

If your image were used in a meme that went viral, what would the caption be?
"The magic is in the curl."

Miriam Brosseau is the Program Director of ELI Talks.

At Tel Aviv Pride conference (from left): Elliot Vaisrub Glassenberg, native Chicagoan now with BINA: Social Justice and Pluralistic Judaism in Israel; Grauer;Gretchen Rachel Hammon, reporter with Windy City Media Group; and Edwards Bruice, chair of Am Keshet, the LGBTQ arm of Temple Sholom in Chicago.

If the whole world is, according to Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav, a gesher tzar m'od, or a "very narrow bridge," then Laurie Grauer is working tirelessly to make it wider.

In 2012, Grauer was among the first honorees of Oy!Chicago and YLD's Double Chai in the Chi, Chicago's Jewish 36 Under 36 list, primarily for her work as co-founder and executive director of Gesher Chicago, which brought LGBT Jews and allies together through original programming and partnering with other local organizations.

Today, Gesher Chicago has joined the ranks of San Francisco-based nonprofit A Wider Bridge, which connects LGBT communities in the U.S. with Israel and LGBT Israeli leaders through programming, resources and trips, to become A Wider Bridge Chicago.

Thanks to a Breakthrough Fund grant from the Jewish United Fund of Metropolitan Chicago, Grauer, now AWB's Midwest manager, will bring top speakers and programming to the Chicago area to strengthen the ties between LGBT communities in Israel and Chicago.

Grauer's own ties to Israel's LGBT communities were transformed in June when she traveled with an AWB delegation to Israel (read about the trip in her blog on Oy!Chicago) to experience the country from an LGBT perspective.The participants visited a kibbutz, Hannaton, with five LGBT families, observed the Knesset's first LGBT forum, attended a three-day leadership conference in Tel Aviv in conjunction with the city's 40th Pride celebration and even toured the West Bank.

Grauer and Todd Shotz, Chair of JQ International, an L.A. based Jewish LGBTQ non-profit, holding a Jewish Pride flag at the start of the 2015 Tel Aviv Pride Parade.

Grauer said the trip drove home a lesson that she learned long ago from a friend.

"I asked [my friend], 'what do you think is so unique about Jews?' She said it's unity. No matter who you are, where you are, if you know someone is Jewish, instantly there's a connection," Grauer said. "Jews, like everyone else, we need to make the world a better place, but especially LGBT Jews; we have this commitment to help each other make the world a better place and to stand by one another, and that shouldn't change no matter the borders or the politics of the countries that are involved."

The trip also gave Grauer a much deeper look into Israel's complexities, especially as both a progressive place in terms of LGBT rights and protections in the Middle East but still one with challenges, as evidence by the stabbing at Jerusalem's Pride parade last month. A Wider Bridge, she says, creates a safe space for asking difficult questions about Israel.

"I wish I could say the stories become simpler with the people you talk to; it doesn't. It gets more complex," Grauer said, "but that doesn't mean you should remove yourself from the conversation."

Grauer created a space for those conversations at JCC's Shabbat on the Lake last Friday and looks forward to getting A Wider Bridge more involved in the community.

In October, A Wider Bridge will bring Anat Nir to Chicago. Nir is an accomplished marketing and advertising professional and LGBT activist in Tel Aviv who co-created the Tel Aviv Gay Vibe online tourism campaign, helping Tel Aviv become known as one of the top LGBT travel destinations in the world. Also, in January, A Wider Bridge is hoping to run programs and seminars in conjuction with the National LGBTQ Task Force's esteemed Creating Change conference, to be held this year at the Hilton Chicago.

But A Wider Bridge is also looking to do more than simply reach Chicago, Grauer says.

"They don't want to simply have a place where they do programs in Chicago, they want Chicago to be a part of the organization," she said.

In the coming months, AWB Chicago will be looking for people who want to become its leaders and stakeholders in Chicago. AWB is also intentionally leaving room for Chicagoans to serve on its advisory board.

"What I love about A Wider Bridge is they are truly looking for partners in this," Grauer said.

Aside from her new role with AWB, Grauer has had other big changes in her life recently including leaving Andersonville after several years and moving in with her partner in Albany Park with their two dogs, Roscoe and Lulav.

To contact Laurie about A Wider Bridge, email her at laurie@awiderbridge.org.

Roscoe and Lulav

In Alonzon Chappel's 1967 painting, Charles Lieberman is one of the bearded physicians staring down to the left of Lincoln on his deathbed. (Courtesy of the Chicago History Museum)

At a time when America's heroes are dwindling, filmmakers, and historians have turned to Illinois's own Abraham Lincoln for inspiration.

Our 16th President inspired Lincoln, Steven Spielberg's 2012 film examining how his political acumen helped him get Congress to pass the 13th Amendment. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter imagines "The Great Emancipator" as a slayer of slaveholding Southern vampires.

But Lincoln's relationship with Jews, a lesser-known story, is the inspiration for a groundbreaking exhibit, "With Firmness in the Right: Lincoln and the Jews," that opens Monday, Aug. 3 at the Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library and Museum in Springfield, Ill. Based on the book Lincoln and the Jews: A History, by Jonathan D. Sarna and Benjamin Shapell, the exhibit opened at the New York Historical Society earlier this year.

"This is not the stories you've heard about Lincoln from textbooks. It opens up a whole new world of another aspect of Lincoln's life," said Carla Knorowski, CEO of the Abraham Lincoln Presidential Library Foundation.

Considering that Lincoln grew up at a time of anti-Semitism, many people may be surprised to learn that he was deeply committed to religious pluralism and had more Jewish friends and acquaintances than any president before him. In 1809, the year of Lincoln's birth, scarcely 3,000 Jews lived in America. By 1865, the year of Lincoln's assassination, that number had increased to 150,000.

Abraham Jonas is a Jewish lawyer from Quincy who is instrumental in Lincoln's political rise. (Courtesy of the Wells Family Collection)

The exhibit includes a series of letters between Lincoln and Abraham Jonas, a Jewish lawyer from Quincy, Ill., who is instrumental in Lincoln's political rise. In a friendship that spans just over two decades, Jonas is one of the first to support Lincoln's candidacy for president and urged the Republican Party to woo political outsiders like the "liberal and freethinking Germans" and "Israelites."

In 1861, Lincoln rewards Jonas' contributions with the plum political appointment of Postmaster of Quincy. But perhaps the greatest testament to their friendship is Lincoln's handwritten order in May 1864 to allow one of Jonas's sons, Charles, then a Confederate POW, "a parole of three weeks to visit his dying father."

Lincoln's fundamental sense of fairness distinguished him throughout his political career. Evidence of this trait appears in many of the documents, photographs, letters, Bibles, and other artifacts assembled for the Springfield exhibit. The items are drawn from a variety of sources including the Shapell Manuscript Foundation, the Chicago Historical Society, Brown University, and the Library of Congress, and some of them are being displayed publicly for the first time.

During the Battle of Vicksburg, Lt. Ephraim M. Joel of St. Louis seized Confederate cannons. With this March 1, 1864 order, Lincoln promoted him Quartermaster with the rank of Captain. (About 50 Jews were appointed quartermasters, but solely on basis of their merit and connections.) (Shapell Manuscript Collection)

The Springfield exhibits includes a tracing of Lincoln's own feet and highlights Lincoln's close relationship with his eccentric foot doctor, the British-born Dr. Issachar Zacharie who is buried in London's Highgate Cemetery. In 1863, The New York World reported that the doctor "enjoyed Mr. Lincoln's confidence more than any other private individual."

Issachar Zacharie was not your average foot doctor; he was also Lincoln's personal spy and emissary. In September 1863, Zacharie met with Benjamin P. Judah, the Confederacy's Jewish Secretary of State, to propose peace negotiations. (The Shapell Manuscript Collection)

The president even sent Zacharie on peace and intelligence missions to the South during the war. Lincoln had just appointed General Banks to replace an anti-Semitic Benjamin F. Butler in the Gulf. With Jewish connections in New Orleans, Zacharie was the ideal choice to help repair relations with its 2,000 Jews. Lincoln urged Banks to make somewhat mysterious use of Zacharie's skills: "I think he might be of service to you, first in his peculiar profession, and, secondly, as a means of access to his countrymen, who are quite numerous in some of the localities you will probably visit."  

Lincoln made bold decisions that transformed Jews from outsiders to insiders in American society. One significant example is Lincoln's overturning of Ulysses Grant's General Orders No. 11 (December 1862) that expelled Jews "as a class" from Union-controlled territory (this included parts of southern Illinois, Tennessee, Kentucky, and Mississippi). Born out of frustration with some Jewish cotton smugglers, Grant's edict qualified as "the most blatant state-sanctioned act of anti-Semitism in American history," according to Lincoln and the Jews.

Daniel Stowell, the Lincoln Presidential Library's curator for the exhibit, agrees that Lincoln's countermand of Grant's order shows how Lincoln stood up to anti-Semitic generals. "Lincoln gave wide latitude to Generals that were succeeding and Grant was one of them," Stowell notes. "Lincoln would have had no trouble if Grant said, 'Okay, all peddlers need to leave the area,' but Lincoln was quoted as saying he did not like condemning a whole group because of a few sinners."

In September 1862, Lincoln took another bold action, appointing Rabbi Jacob Frankel of Philadelphia as the U.S. military's first Jewish chaplain, and that document is included in the Springfield exhibit. At that time, there were 7,000 Jews in the Union Army.

"Many Jews did feel like second-class citizens, especially in the decades prior to the Civil War, but Lincoln establishes this sense that all sorts of people should be treated as equals. The Emancipation Proclamation was all about that idea," he said.

Regarding renewed interest in Lincoln -- the man and the politician-Sarna speculates that, at a time when many Americans are disaffected by the political process, Lincoln's mastery of politics left a lasting impression. "There may be a certain nostalgia toward a president who was Honest Abe. It's really extraordinary when you see the extent to which he was able to live his values and accomplish so many things," he said.

In the days after Lincoln's assassination, rabbis compared the anti-slavery president to the greatest of biblical heroes from the patriarch Abraham to the prophet Moses. When some of our heroes today have disappointed us, it's comforting to know we still have Lincoln.

Jennifer Brody is a former associate editor at JUF News and a freelance writer living in Chicago.

Asha and family at a White Sox game

Asha Goldstein's decision to convert to Judaism was not about her. Although becoming a Jew by choice in 2008 played a big role in developing her identity as a Jewish woman, Goldstein's embrace of Judaism was more about adopting a set of values that emphasizes helping others, and bringing her family closer.

"It was almost a family affair," Goldstein said. "We were all participants throughout the process. And then I went through the mikvah and that felt like a new chapter, a new beginning."

These last seven years, she has cultivated a strong foundation rooted in living those Jewish values daily, both personally and professionally, taking every opportunity for tikkun olam and building community.

Since being named to Oy!Chicago and YLD's Double Chai in the Chi 36 under 36 list in 2014, Goldstein has taken a more active role in her synagogue, B'nai Tikvah in Deerfield, recently becoming a trustee on the synagogue board. She said she hopes to learn and grow from the experience and that her involvement will allow new members to feel welcome.

"Hopefully I will be able to engage more people, get more congregants to our synagogue and share the positive experiences I've had," she said. "Hopefully that will resonate with others."

Goldstein also devotes herself to uniting Jewish people throughout Chicago and the world, including through JUF. She recently participated in a JUF Phonothon, which she said allowed her see the true impact of the JUF's work on the Jewish community.

Some of the individuals shared with her how JUF's services helped change their lives. She said that despite their financial struggles, "they still wanted to make some kind of contribution to the JUF campaign because of the impact that JUF made on their life previously."

Lessons learned about helping others and being a caring individual are something Goldstein is also devoted to passing down to her children. She explains one such lesson through the concept of lighting the candles on Jewish holidays.

"We light all the candles from just one candle, which demonstrates the lesson that you can help others and that doesn't take anything away from you," she said. "You can light other candles without taking anything away from your own."

Asha and family on vacation

Beyond her family, Goldstein practices helping others through her work as a managing principal at Cedar Wealth Management, which educates and counsels individuals, including women and others going through divorce, on financial matters.

Goldstein's office will relocate from downtown Chicago to Rosemont, a move she predicts will allow her to reach new clients, while still allowing her to continue assisting those in the city.

Above all else, Goldstein said she enjoys that her job provides her with yet another opportunity to give back to all kinds of people.

"The most rewarding part of my job is helping people at all levels," she said. "Even though we mostly deal with affluent families, all levels need guidance."

To meet the honorees of the 2015 Double Chai in the Chi, Chicago's Jewish 36 Under 36 List, register YLD's WYLD party at 7 p.m. Thursday, Aug. 13 at John Barleycorn in River North, 149 W. Kinzie St.

From entrepreneurs, to educators, to Jewish professionals paving the way for the future, this city is full of talented, giving, forward-thinking young adults striving to make the world a better place. Take a look at the list!

Most of us  go through life trying to act like a mensch -- but what does that really mean? Jewish filmmaker Tiffany Shlain wants to know.

This summer, she's putting a call out to people all over the world to grab their phones and upload a short video answering "What's your definition of a mensch?" She plans to weave some of the responses as footage in her upcoming short film documentary called The Making of a Mensch, which Shlain is currently producing with her film studio Let It Ripple.

The film will premiere on Sept. 18 -- "Character Day 2015," -- which lands in the middle of the High Holiday season, a natural time of reflection. Rabbis and Jewish educators will incorporate the film as part of their High Holiday curriculum. Shlain, based in San Francisco, hopes to spark a conversation, and to engage 3,000 schools, synagogues, JCCs, camps, and others institutions through the project. So far, the US State Department, Foundation for Jewish Camp, the JCC Association, BBYO, RAVSAK, The Covenant Foundation, National Association of Independent Schools, the San Francisco Unified School District, the Center on Media and Child Health, have partnered on the project.

In a hyperactive, hyper-tech world, Shlain says, people are hungrier than ever to find meaning in their lives. "Everyone is searching for guides to give them tools to live a meaningful, successful, and purposeful life in a 24/7 world," she said. "Things are happening so much more quickly with all this technology, and we're making so many more choices at every turn so having a strong inner fortitude is important."

Tiffany Shain

One of the goals Shlain has for the film is to reclaim the word "mensch" for women. "I want the word to apply to women too because a lot of people use the word only for a man," she said. "In Yiddish, the word is for men and women."

The idea for the latest movie emerged after the success of Shlain's previous film short, last year, called The Science of Character, examining the neuroscience and social science that proves that we can shape who we are and who we want to be.

Jewish educators, like Rabbi Avi Orlow, loved the movie so much that they approached Shlain to make a second film about character development, this time told through the lens of Mussar. A collection of ancient Jewish ethical teachings, Mussar guides Jews to live a more meaningful and purposeful life through certain practices and meditations, and is currently experiencing a revival in the modern world.

Orlow, the founder of the Mussar Institute and Foundation for Jewish Camp's director of Jewish education, teamed up with Shlain on the film after hearing her speak at a conference. "I couldn't help but notice that her film The Science of Character unknowingly mirrored much of the teachings of the Mussar movement," he said. "One of the strengths of an…environment like camp is the opportunity to engage in meaningful character development. Making mensches is what we do. How wonderful…to take a project that has already struck a chord with Jewish camp professionals and put it in the context of ancient Jewish teachings that are still incredibly relevant to us today."

Shlain has created more than two dozen films -- mostly short films blending animation, images, and video input from the public to explore topics in a hip, relevant way. She tends to take on subjects from a neuroscience and social science angle.

The filmmaker dates her interest in the brain back to the fourth grade. It was then that her dad, a brain surgeon, brought a human brain in formaldehyde to her class for show and tell. That same year, her mom went back to school to study psychology -- and would use her daughter as a guinea pig for her homework. Ever since then, Shlain has wanted to make films about matters of the brain.

Named by Newsweek as "one of the women shaping the 21st century," and the founder of the Webby Awards, Shlain created the 2005 documentary short film called The Tribe chronicling the history of the Jewish people -- through the Barbie doll. The film exploded on the Jewish circuit.

With her new film, she's tackling the crux of who we are and who we want to become. "We are all trying to figure out how to be a better person -- a better mother, wife, contributor to the world and our community," she said. "The film [gives] haimisch tools to do that."

To learn more about the The Making of a Mensch and Character Day 2015, to sign up your organization to host a screening of the film, or to submit your own video message about what makes a mensch -- you might make it into the film! -- visit here.

Now is the best time to be deaf -- at least according to Benjamin Lachman, a driving force behind the "Cued Speech" movement and a 2014 honoree of Oy!Chicago and YLD's Double Chai in the Chi, 36 Under 36 list.

"An individual with a perceived disability has every ability to achieve or exceed peer-level expectations given full and unequivocal access to the kinds of educational, vocational, or sociological opportunities that are afforded to society," Lachman said.

As a deaf individual since birth, Lachman has always sought out the best possible avenues in order to hear and understand speech more accurately. His journey toward hearing first started with American Sign Language, which was difficult for his family to learn when he was so young. Then he discovered Cued Speech, a method of lip-reading that uses eight hand shapes to represent consonants. Words are created by speaking and placing hand shapes around the mouth. The method can be applied to many languages, common and uncommon. Lachman and his family were the first family in Illinois to adopt this methodology.

In order to spread knowledge of Cued Speech and help others learn the technique, Lachman started Cue Everything, which collects and creates videos about Cued Speech and allows others to learn more about the program online. Their crowning achievement is a Cued Speech rap video featuring the rapper Twista to his song "Go."

If you look at the video's comments section, you'll notice some resistance to Cued Speech as an alternative to ASL.

"We certainly face challenges in explaining the concept of showing phonological information of conventionally spoken language in a manner that someone with no auditory feedback can still access," Lachman said.

There are elements of speech that ASL does not address. Many deaf individuals who only use basic lip-reading and ASL cannot comprehend phonemes of spoken language, the tiny units of sound in a language that are still capable of conveying a distinct meaning. Cued Speech addresses this nuance in speech comprehension by using combinations of hand shapes (or "cues") to help deaf individuals understand these phonemes despite not being able to hear them.

"I can see exactly what you say, absolutely verbatim, how you say it in the same speed that you would if you were just speaking," Lachman said. The result is that rather than having deaf individuals and their families both learn a new language, Cued Speech gives deaf individuals access to the language being spoken around them.

Helping widen the scope of Cued Speech is just one way Lachman is helping individuals with disabilities better access the world around them. Since being named 36 Under 36, Lachman has been more involved in ADA25Chicago, an initiative honoring the 25th Anniversary of the Americans with Disabilities Act.

This initiative will see all kinds of participating organizations creating and hosting educational, cultural, arts, sports and recreational events that will increase public awareness and improve the quality of life for people with disabilities.

JJsList.com, for which Lachman is the business and community engagement coordinator, is one of the partner organizations involved in the ADA25Chicago effort. The site is a platform for businesses and consumers to foster better communication and to understand each other's needs. Businesses use this platform to discover consumers' opinions and determine which products are successful. The site also allows businesses to become more aware of disabilities and to better communicate with individuals who have them, ultimately creating job opportunities.

"If you've had the opportunity to communicate with various demographics, you'll be far less intimidated by hiring these individuals," Lachman said.

The nature of the workplace puts those with disabilities at a disadvantage and it is difficult to connect employer's needs and the requests of prospective employees. JJsList.com caters to individuals with a range of disabilities and anyone can receive assistance.  

"A big part of what we do as a social enterprise is provide life skills and vocational coaching to assist people in communicating their needs to potential services providers or employers," Lachman said.

Benjamin Lachman (back right) with the JJsList.com training team at the Brookfield Zoo

In order to further the ADA25Chicago effort, JJsList has been hosting Disability Awareness Training workshops, which include role-playing activities and the sharing of personal stories.

"Through this public speaking experience, the Disability Awareness Players themselves build communications and networking skills that they need for employment and workplace success," Lachman said.

The workshops have reached over 3,000 business employees to date, and due to a grant from the Reva and David Logan Foundation, they will be able to expand their effort and dedication to the ADA. Chicago Public Schools and cultural institutions will be part of the mix, and teachers, students, and volunteers will gain a greater knowledge of disabilities and be comfortable interacting with such individuals.

Thanks to the ADA, Lachman says, accessibility and diversity are encouraged, leaving society in a better position as a whole.

"More individuals with disabilities are able to actually believe in themselves and what they are capable of accomplishing," he said.

There are Jewish kids who go to camp, and those who don’t. This list is for those in the former group; latter group, we don’t expect you to understand. And of course we used plenty of Wet Hot American Summer pics, because that’s the only movie that understands you.

The list should also prove that you can take the kid out of camp, but you can take the camp out of the kid.

What else do you do still do that outs you as a camp person?

1. You get nostalgic every summer, especially on the first day or Shabbat of camp

2. At times, showering by yourself makes you sad

3. You still interpret “dressing up” on Friday as a summer dress or khakis

4. You use the phrase “closed-toed shoes” and prefer not to wear them

5. “Attended Jewish camp” is one of your criteria for evaluating roommates and life partners

6. You have thought more than once about making a nikayon/chore wheel for your home/roommates

7. At big home-cooked meals you touch the side of your nose to exempt yourself from clean-up

8. You can’t resist the temptation of empty cups at a picnic-style table

9. You’re more comfortable in large group activities when everyone has a “buddy”

10. You aren’t sure if the guy/girl you like is into you until you go on a walk together

11. You randomly get Hebrew songs or prayer melodies stuck in your head and are nervous you’ll sing them aloud in public and get crazy-stares

12. You hesitate before using Hebrew words or slang in conversation to consider whether anyone will understand you

13. The only way you know how to quiet a group involves Hebrew, or saying “you’re wasting your own free time”

14. When you meet Israelis you hint to your camp experience so they know you totally get them

15. You stop and text a camp friend whenever you hear a song that reminds you of camp

16. You are especially good at making friends feel special on their birthday

17. You still send your friends mail, and get outrageously excited whenever you receive a package, even if it’s just some stuff you ordered on Amazon

18. Some of your closest friends today are the people you met those unforgettable summers

Judges taste the BBQ beef ribs at the Chicago Kosher BBQ Festival and Competition. (Photo by Ralph Schatz)

Things got very steamy at the Second Annual Chicago Kosher BBQ Competition and Festival, held at Anshe Emet Synagogue in Lakeview on Sunday, June 14.

The preparations began the Saturday night before with a thunderstorm and several inches of rain that only the heartiest of barbecue enthusiasts could possible endure. The Chicago Jewish community is made up of tough stuff and these pit masters sloshed through a Chicago summer thunder storm all night long while preparing their kosher delicacies.

Host sponsors for the contest were Milt's Barbecue for the Perplexed, Anshe Emet Synagogue, and the Bernard Zell Anshe Emet Day School; the media sponsor was  JUF News; and the presenting sponsors were The Private Bank, Viva Vantage, and the Jeffrey F. Kahan Memorial Fund.

With 13 teams competing, trophies were awarded in the following categories: Best Brisket, Best Ribs, Best Chicken, Best Beans, Most Original Team Name, Best Booth Decoration, and Grand Champion. RaBBI-Q, under the leadership of Rabbi Mendel Segal, won almost every food category-and was named Grand Champion. "Uncle Mordy, John and the MEATzva Girls" won the award for best brisket. "Burnt Offerings" won awards for best booth décor and most original team name. The Chicago Rabbinical Council supervised the contest.

In addition to the BBQ competition, events included pickle and hot dog-eating contests, and live entertainment featuring the Chicago Boyz Acrobatic Team, a DJ, and Hi-Five Hoops Basketball, and NFL Flag Football clinics. Milt's also served food from its food truck. A $5 donation went to his year's designated charity, Maot Chitim.

As a chef, I was curious about what these meat marathoners brought to the game. A representative from the "Dukes of Chazzer" excitedly told me their secret weapon was one Liam Jankelovics. Indeed, the newly graduated 8th grader looked completely cool and calm while doling out brisket samples. In fact, the entire rain soaked team all looked fresh and eager to send their samples to the judges.

I wanted more. I asked for specifics. Another representative from the Dukes explained that it wasn't just the curry in the sauce that made their BBQ special, it was the TLC! These BBQ teams showed great passion and care in their offerings.

The "Meat is Murder" team told me that nutmeg in their beans was the ace in the hole. They extolled the virtues of less chilies and more herbs in the chicken. Debbie, a spokesperson for the team, echoed the Dukes refrain of "lots of love."

The technique of adding "love" was heard over and over again from the "Caught Smokin" to "Bris-Cut BBQ" teams. I can tell you that, as a chef, I tell my staff that one of the keys to turning a great dish into an amazing dish is putting love into it. I wasn't surprised to hear that the love extended to great sportsmanship and teams covering other teams' backs.

Unfortunately, the team of "Uncle Mordy, John and the MEATzva Girls" had a sudden death in Uncle Mordy's family, and had to fly back to their home in New York before the contest. Other teams including "Rib Roastin' Rabbis" covered the food for Uncle Mordy. Such is the spirit of community at the Kosher BBQ Competition.

I admit I was surprised to hear that several competitors had really put their all into the competition and had been practicing their craft to the point of being on Lipitor! After some thought, I realized that putting your all into great food and loving what you are doing is what it's all about.

The large pool of judges, under the guidance of the representatives from Kansas City Barbecue Society (KCBS), eagerly dove into their boxes of BBQ.

Rabbi Mendel Segal, Executive Director at Kansas City Vaad and BBQ enthusiast, instructed the judges on their criteria. He zealously explained that the Holy Grail of kosher BBQ is brisket. Perfectly cooked brisket should have a melting texture with a drop of pull and, above all, should be moist!

There are often-always-times when we Jews don't agree on things. In the case of BBQ, we all agree on one thing-that we all love to eat. The BBQ competition, as Milt's owner Jeff Aeder explained, is about "welcoming the guest" and "inclusivity." Indeed the dining tent was overflowing with Jews of all denominations and non-Jews alike, all elbow to elbow, enjoying BBQ and the festival.

Laura Frankel is a noted Kosher Chef and owner of Pickled Tongue Catering and Foods. Her book Jewish Slow Cooker Recipes: 120 Holiday and Everyday Dishes Made Easy will be released in paperback on Aug. 11. Check out her website at www.cheflauraskosher.com.

You may not know Simon Feil's name, but you've likely seen his face. Perhaps he was cooking in the movie Julie & Julia , or being startled by the '80s in a Delta flight safety video, or giving a young Bruce Wayne a good talking to on Gotham. Look out for him next time you turn on Netflix.  

Simon is coming in to Chicago in June to deliver an ELI talk, a Jewish TED-style talk, about empathy as the foundation of a moral world. I sat down with him to try and walk a mile in his shoes and found out he's definitely a Jew you should know.  

1. You're a real renaissance man! What's the most unusual job you've ever held?  

Well, that's not really a fair question since actors do lots of unusual things. Choking someone with a belt, having a heart attack and pulling an ear of corn out of my pants would all qualify as unusual. But if we're going to stick to regular jobs, I'd say it's a toss-up between being a beer ambassador for Guinness and playing a time-travelling '90s dude for Trivial Pursuit. Ok, wait, no those are still act-y things. How about working at a kibbutz daily? Teaching sushi in a strip club? I once got paid (and fed) to pick 10 awesome restaurants and bring a group of people to each one and talk about the cuisine while we ate. I also drove an RV around for Dunkin Donuts once giving away free Coolattas. So my sense of the unusual may be dulled by this point -- you tell me.

2. When did you know you wanted to be an actor?  

I performed in my first play in eighth grade, 1984 , a particularly chilling and odd choice for a yeshiva, and was instantly introduced both to the thrill of acting and the pain of rejection -- I got beat out for my preferred role by a friend. But I knew right then there was nothing more exhilarating and nothing else I'd rather do. The "why" has changed over the years, but never the "what."

3. How does Judaism influence your work on screen, practically and artistically?  

That's a tough one - I spent most of my career drawing a hard dividing line between my acting identities and Jewish identities. I saw their values as being divergent and was told by mentors in both worlds that the other was totally anathema and would only pull me down or hold me back. It's only in the past few years that I've realized they were all wrong and that any artist needs to be fully themselves to do anything worthwhile. That said, I'd say the themes I am drawn to are certainly informed by my Judaism -- justice, truth-telling, fervent curiosity and questioning.

Practically, and less interestingly, as someone who is shomer Shabbos (Shabbat observant), I have always had great challenges with working out the conflict. It's part of why I transitioned from theater to TV, I couldn't handle losing Shabbat for two months while I walked to the theater for a show.

4. What's your favorite character you've ever played and why?  

The character of Ern Malley. He was a hoax, a fake poet invented to send up the Modernist poets by some contemporaries. A playwright in a company I was in wrote this incredible play that imagined him as a real person who'd been turned into a hoax after he died young suddenly, and now he's back from the dead to set the record straight.  He shows up as a ghost to David Remnick (of The New Yorker ) in the Algonquin Hotel bar to convince him to publish new work and tell the world he was real. It's this toothy, intellectually rugged two-hander with huge themes and stakes and I bit into it like a big hot meal. Didn't hurt that he was working class English and I love what that accent does to me. We did it for a few readings, sadly it was never given a full production, but it's still my favorite piece of all time. It dealt with all my favorite themes above, it was brash and balls-out and fearless and physical and earthy while also being an incredibly brilliant and articulate philosophical discussion about art and success and failure and ooh, everything. Alex Lewin (the playwright) if you're reading this, I hope you're still cranking out the goods.

5. You played a chef in the movie Julie & Julia and now run a company that provides sushi lessons at events. What would you say are the elements of a great meal?  

Hah -- those two go more hand in hand than you know. I often get auditions for chef roles because of my sushi business, and Julie & Julia was just such an audition! To answer you, obviously, the quality of the food is tantamount. At heart, I'm actually a stomach and a mouth -- give me a big hearty piece of meat, cooked perfectly over a fire or slow smoked and I don't care about much else -- how it looks, how clean I am or how pretty my table is. That said, I do love a small, elegant Asian-style meal with small portions, perfectly balanced visually, with complimentary tastes and textures, all accompanied by good music, a beautiful space while I'm well dressed. But I'll still pick that backyard or beach or forest BBQ every time.

6. Your upcoming ELI talk is all about empathy for animals, especially when it comes to our decisions about eating meat. Is this a way of asking Jews to "get into character?" 

I suppose, though I try to avoid such puns like the plague. :) "Acting is doing" is the cornerstone of the Meisner technique, the one I was trained under and I think the same can be said about Judaism. Judaism is doing. We have to walk the walk. It's not about what you believe or feel as much as it is about what you do. Judaism doesn't have thought-crime or -isms, it has actions. It has been said that, rather than Orthodox, observant Jews should be called Orthoprax -- from -praxis, doing, rather than, -doxy, believing. So yes, the right character for Jews to inhabit is one that embraces empathy in an active, very non-academic way.

7. Who do you admire in the Jewish world, the food world, and the acting world?  

I have a hard time with public declarations of admiration. I'm far too much of an ivory tower idealist to not poke holes in my heroes. That said, R' David Weiss Halivni is someone I look up to and his famous quote, "Those I pray with I can't talk to, and those I talk to I can't pray with" has resonated with me for a long time, though I'm trying to make that Venn diagram overlap more every day.  

In the food world, I'd say Temple Grandin -- while technically not in the food world, in that she doesn't make food, she has revolutionized the animal treatment landscape. And celebrity chefs don't impress me. But Ari White of the Wandering 'Cue, makes some especially fine kosher BBQ.  

Acting: It used to be the great talents, Meryl Streep and Robert Duvall, who impressed me. But I find myself more moved these days by stories of great effort -- Vin Diesel buying a typewriter and cranking out an entire screenplay in a month so he could return it since he couldn't afford it. Or Matt Damon and Ben Affleck getting Good Will Hunting made. That was Herculean and very worthy of admiration. I also happen to really like their work.

8. What's next?  

I'm officiating at a wedding in Italy in June (my first!) and I'm on hold for a few projects in the acting world so we'll see what pans out. I'm working on creating a personal piece from my own material, either for stage or screen, I haven't decided yet. That's scary and will require lots of work, so face into the wind.

Find out more about Simon at his website: www.simonfeil.com. Simon will be speaking on "Eating Meat? Empathy as the Foundation of a Moral World" on June 18 at WTTW11 in Chicago as part of the latest production of ELI Talks. Get your tickets to see him and five other speakers present their TED-style "inspired Jewish ideas" on new Jewish culture here.

Give an unforgettable gift this Father's Day. Oy!Chicago is looking for guest writers of all experience levels to contribute to our next special blog series, "World's Greatest (Jewish) Dads," a collection of stories recognizing and honoring fathers.

You could tell a specific story, or write an overall tribute to your dad or any father figure in your life. Or maybe you're a new or expectant dad reflecting on that experience. Whatever your idea, we want to help you get published! 

To pitch your idea, write a paragraph describing what your piece would be about and send it to info@oychicago.com by Friday, June 5. The only requirements are that the post should in some way relate to the theme, and that you are 21 or older. We will review your submission and let you know if we are interested in working with you and running your piece in the series, which will run the week leading up to Father's Day, June 15-19.

Please note that Oy!Chicago is a volunteer-staffed website, so we are unable to pay for published submissions at this time. If you have any questions, email them to info@oychicago.com.

Thanks for your interest!

Stef & Steven

When new Emojis rolled out for the iPhone last month (including the Israeli flag!), we got to thinking – there aren't enough Emojis for Jews. Be it for the multitude of holiday greetings or just texting with your mother, a visual aid would make your conversation that much easier.

So we devised a list of 18 "Jewmojis" that we think need to exist, sketched them up, and provided "hypothetical" examples of how they could be used in conversation.

If you like them, share this post and let's get them made for real!

(Graphics by Alyssa Zeller and Rita Schoikhett)

1. Synagogue

2. Bagel

3. Falafel in a pita

4. Matzo ball soup

5. Kvelling mother

6. Smiley face with a yarmulke

7. Torah scroll

8. Shabbat candles and challah

9. Matzah

10. Hamantaschen

11. Menorah

12. Israeli flag heart

13. Israeli camel

14. Chamsah

15. Chai

16. Shaming Bubbe

17. "Kein ahora!" (Puh Puh)

18. "Oy!"

Who is an extraordinary Jew you know? We are looking for the young leaders, humanitarians, educators, social activists and movers and shakers of Chicago to be part of Double Chai in the Chi: Chicago's annual Jewish 36 under 36 list.

Presented by YLD and Oy!Chicago, Double Chai in the Chi shines a spotlight on the faces of Chicago's Jewish future and recognizes the amazing contributions of our generation. (Check out last year's list for reference.)

What we're looking for:

People who are making a difference through their work, who give back in their free time, who innovate and inspire, who are leaders in their communities and the Jewish community or are simply Jews we should know.

How to nominate:

Got someone in mind? Fill out this form before May 21. You will receive an email confirming your nomination. 

When will the list be announced?

The 36 honorees will be announced and profiled on Oy!Chicago on July 21 and recognized at YLD's WYLD party on Aug. 13. To be the first to know, like Oy!Chicago and YLD on Facebook.

The name 'Trump' has been a household name for decades. But lately Donald is sharing the spotlight with the younger generation of Trumps—his sons and his daughter, Ivanka.

Ivanka, who has a business degree from Wharton, is charged with the domestic and global expansion of her dad's company's real estate interests and she's the founder of Ivanka Trump Fine Jewelry and Ivanka Trump Footwear. She has launched #WomenWhoWork, which celebrates the multidimensional lives of modern women. After meeting her husband, who is Jewish, Ivanka converted to Judaism, and the couple has a young daughter and son.

Ivanka, who will speak at JUF’s Women’s Division’s Spring Event on May 12, recently conducted an email interview with Oy!Chicago, where she talked about her entrepreneurial pursuits, the balancing act of the modern woman, and who she admires most.

Oy!Chicago: You do so much professionally—in the Trump Organization, in real estate and hotel management, in jewelry, in your lifestyle collection. What are you most passionate about in the professional world?
Ivanka Trump: Real estate has always been my passion. I grew up touring construction sites, visiting our properties and hotels with my father and could not get enough… I ingested everything I could get my hands on, observed my peers and supervisors, and experienced as much as possible. I always felt l had something to prove and, in some ways, I guess I did. Eventually I started making my own deals and managing my own team and projects. 

I'm an entrepreneur at heart, and I saw a great opportunity to dress young, professional women in a stylish yet attainable way and decided to enter the marketplace with accessories... Our brand is targeted to millennials in the early stages of their careers. [Our customer] is a woman who leads with smarts, but is able to transition quickly between her various roles in professional and personal capacities. 

What are the challenges that come with having such a famous father, when you're trying to make your own way in the world?
I'm incredibly grateful for my family and both of my parents. I think time has debunked some of the criticisms that people might throw at me. There will always be those who will say I wouldn't be in this position if not for my father and they very well may be right, but I also know I work very hard and have a lot to be proud of. One thing that I know for sure is that I could have chosen to do far less!

My brothers and I are so incredibly fortunate to work alongside our father and it has been an amazing experience, especially in these early stages of our careers. Family businesses tend to be very binary; they are either a total disaster or incredibly successful. Thankfully we represent the latter and that is due, in part, to how well we work as a collective and separately, but regardless we are always working towards a common goal. 

Who are your biggest role models?
My mother has always been a great source of inspiration for me. She is incredibly smart, passionate and wickedly funny. I'm also inspired by the young women today who are working to build lives that they want to live. My father has also had an enormous impact on me. I certainly learned a lot about deal making, building, developing—generally he's taught me what it means to be a great leader and a great parent. Both of my parents were the biggest influence on me and I'm so fortunate to work alongside my father and continue to learn from him every day. 

Studies continue to show that women still earn less money than their male counterparts doing the same work. How can we encourage women to keep "leaning in" and be confident and brave at work?
It's a proven fact that having women in the boardroom is an asset and I think companies are beginning to recognize the value of this more and more. It's amazing to see women holding the high level positions once reserved for men. 

Do you think a lot of these challenges will be gone by the time your daughter enters the workforce?
I tend to think stereotypes and assumptions are growing increasingly irrelevant—in fact, shedding light on what it actually looks like to be a professional woman was one of our goals in originally launching the #WomenWhoWork initiative on my website IvankaTrump.com.

How do you define modern women today?
Women today are working hard at all aspects of their lives…[They] embody the realities of life and works at everything [they] do: being a mother, nurturing her career, her marriage, or relationships. They are smart, ambitious and passionate about their careers—but not defined by them. These women, myself included, are multidimensional. We are doing work we love, work that inspires us, and we're also pursuing our personal passions and making them priorities. There really aren't many accurate depictions of working women today in advertisements and pop culture. Companies are still featuring these one-dimensional caricatures of women, usually outfitted in boring pant suits, striding up 5th Avenue. It's comical. I wanted to illustrate what women who work really look like and create a platform from which to tell their stories.

As a successful young woman in business and as a mother of two, what is your advice to other young women trying to pursue their dreams in life—both personal and professional?
Seek out opportunities you are truly passionate about, work extremely hard, and never stop evolving and improving. 

For more information on the Spring Event 2015, contact the Women's Division Office at (312) 357-4821 or WomensDiv@juf.org.

I first saw Yuri Lane doing a beatbox workshop at JCC Apachi summer camp. I was immediately taken with his combination of beatbox and harmonica. I had never seen anything like it. I got to know him and started following his work and have since brought Yuri in to teach beatbox/acting/movement workshops with my classes at Columbia College Chicago.

A couple weeks ago, I chatted with Yuri on my new podcast, Under the Lights (listen to the episode here), which highlights the work of Chicago artists — actors, directors, writers, musicians, improvisers, performance artists, casting directors, and others. You can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes for free or listen to/download individual episodes at underthelights.libsyn.com. You can also connect with us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/utlpodcast and on Twitter: @UTLPodcast.

Yuri has long made Chicago his home but has toured the country with his hip-hop show “From Tel Aviv to Ramallah: A beatbox journey.” He is also a YouTube sensation, with one of his videos eclipsing 10 million views. For more information on this Jew You Should Know, along with music and videos, visit yurilane.com

1. What was your first exposure to live performance and what impact did it have on you?

My first live performance was seeing my Mom playing violin for the San Jose symphony.

2. What inspired you to develop “From Tel Aviv to Ramallah?”

The inspiration behind “From Tel Aviv to Ramallah” is based on a trip I took with my wife Rachel Havrelock (playwright, director of show) in ‘98. We travelled from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem to Ramallah during the course of a week. Each day I would rewind each experience with a beatbox. 

3. Which performers do you look up to?

I look up to performers who have inspired and taught me about mirroring the world with art. I had the chance to see and perform with Robin Williams, the master of improv. Peter Sellers always made me laugh and seeing him in Being There made me even more of a fan. Lily Tomlin is another one of my favorites. Crazy story is my father-in-law was Lily's boyfriend in college. I met her and she is a humble amazing person and an incredible live performer!

4. What collaborations have made the biggest impact on you?

The biggest collaboration I've done is with my wife Rachel and partner Sharif Ezzat on the show “From Tel Aviv to Ramallah,” a beatbox journey. This collaboration has taken this show all over the U.S. and beyond bringing humanity and the hip-hop theater perspective to the Middle East conflict.

5. How did you discover and begin to use beatbox as a pathway to storytelling?

I was rehearsing a play in San Francisco and had a small part. It left me time to develop my solo show. I had a moment where I started beatboxing, dancing and doing mime at the same time and said to myself “this is what I'm going to do!” Combine all the techniques to create the genre of beatbox theater!

6. What role does hip-hip play in our society today?

I teach hip-hop and theater to kids of all ages. Hip-hop can be a wonderful reflection and collage of art and culture. I'm all about teaching kids about the roots of hip-hop. Afrika bambatta said the true message of hip-hop is PEACE, LOVE, UNITY and having fun.

7. How does Judaism inspire and inform your work as an artist?

The social justice part of Judaism is important to me. I feel the most connected to G-D when I'm on stage, but the Jewish rituals and holidays bring an awareness as a human being and citizen of this planet Earth. 

8. What goals do you have for yourself as an artist and/or teacher?

I want to continue to explore my solo beatbox work and practicing my art ‘til the day I leave this earth! I want to start a beatbox and performance movement in Chicago for generations to come!    

Passover is almost here, which means Jews everywhere are about to embark on their annual religiously mandated Atkins diet. We know parting with sweet, sweet gluten for eight days can lead to agonizing, salad-filled melancholy – especially in a foodie city like Chicago – so now is the time to load up, friends.

Last year, Oy! blogger Lauren Schmidt listed her recommendations for enjoying those final meals before total grain abstinence, so we thought we'd come up with a definitive list of Chicago's top bread-based goodies.

Happy carb-cramming, Oy!sters! (Oh, and chag sameach too.)

1. Deep dish pizza from just about anywhere

Let's start with the obvious. Whether you're a Lou's, Gino's, Gio's, Peaquod's, etc. guy or gal, Chicago pizza is the biggest loss we morn each and every Pesach.

2. Mac 'n Cheese Pizza – Dimo's

What's better than pizza? Pizza topped with more carbs. Oh, and if you love Dimo's, you should read our interview with him. – Wrigleyville, Bucktown

3. Mac 'n Cheese Grilled Cheese – Cheesie's

While we're adding macaroni to everything … -Lakeview

4. Brick oven pizza – Spacca Napoli

Not a deep-dish fan? It's like they smuggled this place out of Italy and slapped it in Ravenswood. And if they have the burrata cheese, GET THE BURRATA. - Ravenswood

5. Pasta – Maggiano's

Mama mia! This-a place has everything! - City and suburblocations

6. Pad Thai – Penny's Noodle Shop

Pesach Thai is here! … well, more like pre-Pesach Thai. - Lakeview, Wicker Park

7. Ramen – Oiistar

You'll have to pass over Ramen too, so slurp's up! - Wicker Park

8. Biscuits – Bang Bang Pie Shop

SO FLUFFY. And oh yea, there's pie too -Logan Square

9. Dutch Baby and Apple pancakes – Walker Bros. Original Pancake House

Holy Moses! – Suburb locations

10. French toast – The Bongo Room

Breakfast – the most decadent meal of the day! (Bonus points if it's made from challah.) -Wicker Park, Andersonville

11. Doughnuts – The Doughnut Vault

We donut know what we're going to do for eight days … - Near North, Near West Side

12. Chocolate chip coffee cake – Leonard's Bakery

Try it, you'll like it … - Northbrook

13. Pie – First Slice

Bye, bye, miss quite glutinous pie – Andersonville, Ravenswood, Albany Park

14. Chocolate cake – Portillo's

By which all chocolate cakes are measured. – City and suburb locations

15. Cupcakes – Molly's Cupcakes

Nom-aste. – Lincoln Park

16. Bread – Pastoral

And then there's plain delicious golden bread. (With a side of not-Manischewitz please) –Lakeview, The Loop, West Loop

17. Beer – Hop Leaf

How dare you assume we forgot about liquid bread! And only the finest, please. You should probably also order a sandwich while you're at it - Andersonville

18. Bagels - New York Bagel & Bialy

And of course, the bubbe of all carbohydrates. – Lincolnwood, and wherever amazing bagels in Chicago are sold, including Chicago Bagel Authority and Beans and Bagels.

Oy!Chicago is looking for guest writers of all experience levels to contribute to our next special blog series, “Repairing Our World,” a collection of stories and reflections on tikkunolam, making the world a better place.

We are looking for guest-submitted stories of any kind of effort to make the world a better place, whether it’s your life’s work or one day that you’ll never forget . Whether you have a great story that’s ready to publish now or are looking for some help finding the words, we want to work with you and your idea!

The blog series will run the week of Earth Day, April 20-24.To pitch your idea, write a paragraph describing what your piece would be about and send it to info@oychicago.com by Friday, March 27. The only requirements are that the post should in some way relate to the theme, and that you are 21 or older. We will review your submission and let you know if we are interested in working with you and running your piece in the series.

Please note that Oy!Chicago bloggers are volunteers, so we are unable to pay for published submissions at this time. If you have any questions, email them to info@oychicago.com

Thanks for your interest!

Stef & Steven

I met David Schwartzbaum at JCC Apachi Day Camp, and have worked with him there in a number of capacities over the last five years, but our connection also extends beyond entertaining Jewish children and into the realm of performance theater. 

David started performing theater and comedy in Miami before moving to Philadelphia and becoming the founder and co-artistic director of The Off-Color Theatre Company. After producing/acting/writing seven world premieres including full-length productions like “No-Talent Hacks” and “Bailout! The Live Action Sitcom,” David moved to Chicago and graduated from the Second City Conservatory and the iO training program. You can find him writing for www.hipsterjew.com, at the Annoyance Theater taking classes, or at home watching wrestling.

Last month, I had the privilege of chatting with David on my new podcast, Under the Lights (listen to the episode here), which highlights the work of Chicago artists — actors, directors, writers, musicians, improvisers, performance artists, casting directors, and others. Each episode is a unique opportunity to get to know the people who make up our Chicago arts community, and a place for artists to promote their work. New episodes are released every Monday and Thursday. You can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes for free or listen to/download individual episodes at underthelights.libsyn.com. You can also connect with us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/UTLPodcast and on Twitter: @UTLPodcast.

David is definitely a Jew you should know, so I also asked him eight questions about his comic influences, icons, what he’s up to and who would be on his Jewish Mt. Rushmore. 

1. What comedians influenced you at a young age?

It all starts and ends with Mel Brooks, who truly influenced me at a very young age without me even realizing it. Blazing Saddles, History of the World Part I, The Producers, these were the films that truly got my brain working differently. Mitch Hedberg was a huge influence on me as well, I listened to him when I was 13 and was blown away. I couldn't believe how smart and funny he was. It infuriated me my brain didn't work the way his did, I was impressed, I was jealous and I had to do what he was doing. At 16 is when I watched my first George Carlin special, and he made me so scared. The stuff he was saying scared the hell out of me to the point where I said, wow, I got to write like that ... and I never will

2. What is your favorite Tom Arnold movie?

You know ... truth be told ... I cannot think of one Tom Arnold movie! Like no joke! Was he in the movie ... what was that movie that had all that controversy after 9/11? Big Trouble? (just looked it up on IMDB) OH NO! That's Tom Sizemore! hahahaha! Oh boy, this is a disaster. This is a true story. I was watching the second or third season of Last Comic Standing, this had to be 10 years ago, and they said they had a guest judge, “comedy legend” Tom Arnold and I turned to my mother, whom I was watching the show with, and I said, “comedy legend?” And my mother turns to me and says “eh. Just let him have it.” That's my Tom Arnold memory.

3. What makes you laugh?

The darker the better. Someone getting a paper cut? Not so funny. Someone being put into a giant paper bag and then that paper bag being shaken violently until the man turns into a pile of (kosher) gelatinous goop and then a dog licks it up? HILARIOUS.

4. What song played under the picture montage in your bar mitzvah video?

No Joke. “World's Greatest” by R. Kelly. 

5. Who are the best comedians or groups working right now in Chicago?

You hear of this thing Book of Mormon? I hear it's pretty good. Ryan Archibald is fantastic. He's directing a lot, but go see anything he does. The show I've watched more than any show since I've been in Chicago is “Messing with a Friend at the Annoyance Theater; Susan Messing is a queen. The Ruckus at the iO is a fantastic Harold team. Although I haven't gotten a chance to see them, I've heard amazing things about the CIC team Gigantic, they've got some hilarious people on that team. If anyone wants to take me, I'm a very mediocre date!

6. What projects do you have coming up?

I've got two projects opening at the end of April I've been working tirelessly on. 

I am writing and producing a five-episode, live-action sitcom entitled “In Fraud We Trust,” which will be going up at Stage 773's Blackbox all through May, Thursday nights at 10:30 p.m. as well as a ‘60s cabaret-style sketch revue show that will be happening at the iO Theater Fridays at 8 p.m.

Also stay tuned, my improv group “Switch Committee” will be starting another run in April as well. Check us out at www.Switchcommittee.com. 

7. Who is on your Mount Rushmore of famous Jews?

Oh boy. Wow. Mt. Rushmore only has four? Sheesh. Man, this is narrowing it down, but just like the premise of Aladdin, only the most pure-hearted can get the prize.

1. Theodore Herzl. He was a baller. Everyone was like, “Yo Herzl. Uganda?”  And he was like “**** no.” They were like, “come on East Africa!” and he was like, “suck it.” Guy was the Kanye of the early 1900s. He changed the game.

2. Albert Einstein. Gotta go with Einstein, without him we wouldn't have nuclear weapons.

3. Joan Rivers. THAT'S RIGHT! I'M PUTTING A WOMAN ON THE MOUNTAIN! A POWERFUL, INTENSE, BEHEMOTH OF A WOMAN! She had more balls than any man on this mountain! Her and Herzl! Biggest balls of all Jews put together!

And of course, number four, is the person we all wanted to be, the person our parents brought up every time we didn't want to go to temple and that is: 

4. Sandy Koufax. “If he didn't play in the World Series on Yom Kippur then you cannot play your Game Boy on Friday nights!” Damn you Sandy Koufax, you talented Semitic beautiful S-O-B.

8. Have you found the afikomen?

Yes I did! But it was at the same time I found out that God doesn't exist, and oh man was that a real buzzkill!

^{Jon Stewart}

Oy vey! Comedy Central legend, Jon Stewart is leaving The Daily Show after 16 years! When I first heard the news I couldn’t believe it. I became a bit verklempt. Why was I feeling this way? Why is Jon leaving me? What am I now going to fill my need for news with? How will I get through the next election? What will replace this show on my DVR? And why am I asking so many questions?!

The last answer, I know. I am Jewish. We ask questions. It’s what we do. Since we were young we were taught to question and ask why. And that’s what Jon Stewart does every evening on his parody news show that’s won two Peabody Awards and 18 Emmys. He’s like a hip funny rabbi that makes us question ourselves, society, Republicans, Democrats, Bush, Obama, the media, and deep-dish pizza (which still rules—I live in Chicago, duh).

For a whole generation of young people, Jon Stewart has made being informed and learning about the news cool. A comedian is the voice of the people and through this satirical comedy news show, Stewart has stood up for us, taught us to question, and made sure we held ourselves (i.e. Fox, Fox News, Fox and Friends, Fox, Fox, Fox) accountable all while being funny. Do you know how many times I’ve told my mom she should watch The Daily Show to get her news?! A lot.

^{The author…on a typical Tuesday.}

So many young Jewish Americans identify with Stewart. Maybe it’s because this Jew from Jersey does impressions of Jerry Lewis that remind us of Uncle Saul or maybe it’s because he grew up similar to us being surrounded by the same Jewish family values, traditions, and dysfunctional meshugas at your sister’s kid’s bris. Whatever the case, he is one of us and we just get him. When Adam Sandler sang The Chanukah Song, it made me proud to be Jewish, but Jon Stewart made me want to be a better person. He fills a void for people looking for hope. He is able to articulate what so many of us are thinking. This mensch gives us hope that there is better in the world; that the bar should be raised a little higher. He is a role model.  

As an aspiring comedian from Skokie, it’s always been a dream of mine to meet Stewart. His standup comedy is second to none and MTV’s The Jon Stewart Show (circa 1993; Netflix it!) also ruled. In 2006, the day before I left on my Birthright Israel trip, my dream came true. A good friend of mine, who is now a senior producer for The Daily Show, brought me backstage to check out the offices and meet the staff. As I was walking through the hallway, this short, silver-haired Jewish man walked up to me with a smile and introduced himself.  

“Jon Stewart,” he said. I almost didn’t recognize him because he was wearing a sweat shirt and jeans. I thought, “Where’s the suit?” Then I thought, “Who cares?! It’s Jon Stewart!” He was really nice too. Don’t you love hearing when someone you like a lot is nice? They say you’re only as good as the company you keep. The company Stewart kept included a diverse crew of clever, funny, and talented individuals, not to mention Steven Colbert and Steve Carrell.

People from different backgrounds came together to put on this awesomeness that informed, entertained, and encouraged young people to care more about the world around them and take an interest in current events. It’s like this show is setting an example for the world to follow. Stewart no doubt identifies with being Jewish, but he believes it’s more important that we all strive to be good people. And if everyone tried being the best version of themselves, this world would be a better place.

Stewart will go down as one of the most influential voices of our generation. Thank you for teaching us, guiding us, and making us young (?) adult Americans proud to be Jewish, Mr. Stewart! We look forward to your next adventure.

And now, for your moment of Zen: The Daily Show electric guitar theme song plays in the background as a monkey sitting at a news desk tries putting on big shoes.

Seth Davis is a writer, actor, and stand-up comedian who lives in Chicago. See him at Zanies, The Laugh Factory, and Twitter @sethd78, and check out his new website starting in mid March, www.sethdaviscomedy.com.

^{Dr. Robert Birnecker & Dr. Sonat Birnecker Hart, Koval Founders}

In 2008, Sonat Birnecker Hart, an esteemed teacher, lecturer and writer on Jewish Studies and German Jewish Cultural History, gave up her tenure and started making whiskey.

While traveling and teaching in Europe and the U.S. was, for Hart, a “joyful way to keep the world of my grandparents and great grandparents alive,” when it came time to start her own family, she decided she wanted a lifestyle where she could work with her children close at hand. So, she and her husband, Robert Birnecker, moved back to Hart’s hometown of Chicago and opened KOVAL, Chicago’s first distillery since the 1800s. Robert, an Austrian native, grew up helping his grandparents at their award-winning distillery and eventually became one of Europe’s leading experts on distilling technology.

KOVAL, which means blacksmith, but in Yiddish means “black sheep,” makes spirits from only heart cuts of the distillate to ensure the absolute smoothest whiskey, rye, gin and more. It’s also organic, local and, yes – kosher certified. 

In addition to launching KOVAL’s line of nationally and internationally award-winning whiskeys, liqueurs and specialty spirits, Robert and Sonat co-founded Kothe Distilling Technologies, which over the last few years alone has helped more than 1,000 people starting their own distilleries through local workshops.

Hart heads up product development, distribution and marketing for KOVAL and works alongside her two boys, just as she planned. With this list of impressive accomplishments – on top of helping us get our kosher drink on – Sonat Birnecker Hart is definitely a Jew You Should Know. 

1. Other than it being part of Robert’s family history, what intrigued you about distilling and the spirits business?

If we were going to leave our careers, we wanted to do something we could be proud of that would allow for the lifestyle of an old fashioned family business. I was also excited about having a business that would allow me the freedom to work with my husband and have my children close at hand. For instance, I was able to nurse two children on demand, while increasing our distribution network. This could not have happened outside of a family business. Our children now have their own office at the distillery and understand what it means to work. We also enjoyed being able to make something of high quality from scratch, and helping to educate a new generation of distillers through our Kothe Distilling Workshops and consulting. 

2. What inspired you to have your spirits certified kosher?

We would not want to make a product that would leave anyone out when it came time for a “L’chaim.” Certifying our products kosher is also a representation of our identity as a Jewish owned company.

3. In what ways have the skills and experiences you gained from your studies or career in academics prepared you or been an asset in your present work?

One never “throws anything away” when it comes to knowledge. There have been countless times that I thought of my studies and the subjects I have taught while growing our business. It was amusing how often Kafka came to mind as I worked to get the liquor laws changed in Illinois. Moreover, we use a lot of academic skills: a lot of research when developing products, consulting and teaching, and Robert especially, has educated himself as to how to help further engineer pot stills. We have educated over 2,000 people in the art of distilling and starting a distillery and set up over 75 distilleries for other in the U.S. and Canada in the last six years. We have continued our academic lives in a new way, which has been very rewarding: www.kothedistilling.com

4. Have your boys taken an interest in the family business? If so, how have you involved them? Any related funny stories? 

They have taken a sense of ownership for KOVAL. I am often talking to people about business when they are around, and from time to time, they have sat with me in meetings or have listened to me on the phone in the car. I am always surprised by how much they pick up about the business by being around us.  Recently my eldest son told me: “We need more billboards! It would give us more impressions!” Perhaps he will be head of marketing someday. He has also been known to check the whiskey section of every grocery store we go to and has from time to time, given a pitch to an unsuspecting shopper: “That whiskey you are looking at. Well, it’s our whiskey, we make it here in Chicago. It is organic and kosher and made from grain to bottle at our distillery up the street and if you buy it, it would significantly help my toy budget.”

Sometimes when we go to the distillery at night to check something, they will say, “Where is everyone, why isn’t anyone working? There are bottles to be packaged.” They are around a lot and know how our products are made, how they are sold, the nature of a distributor, marketing, and even social media. I have heard, “You should tweet that, Mom,” more than once. At times having your kids at work can have unforeseen consequences though: once our eldest decided to take my husband’s cell phone to play Angry Birds: Star Wars and accidentally tweeted his game onto our KOVAL Twitter account. Some thought we were engaging in some strange co-marketing with Angry Birds when they saw on our feed, “The time has come Luke Skysquaker.” “Hide your eggs well Hans Cherplo,” on our Twitter feed. 

5. What’s your favorite cocktail (using one of your spirits, of course) for pairing with a Jewish holiday? Bonus points if you have ideas that are kosher for Passover …

We did a feature on our blog about the “8 cocktails of Hanukkah,” which had a lot of fun Hanukkah-inspired cocktails, though my favorite of the bunch was:

"No, this is not our biggest holiday" Cocktail
3 oz. Rye
Ice
An exasperated sigh

I tend to drink our spirits straight, so that “cocktail” was a particular favorite.  Our brandy is made only from fruit but it is not kosher for Passover because we have not had a chance to close our facility to make only kosher for Passover products for a few weeks. We hope to someday.

6. What do you love most about what you do?

I can be a mom and a working-woman at the same time. I can answer emails at Kids Science Labs or Goldfish Swim School and still have lunch with my kids. Sometimes things take a little longer to get done, but that is fine. I am working with my husband and an amazing team of people who make building our business a real joy. It is a lot of hard work, but so worth it.

7. If there were to ever be another prohibition (G-d forbid) and you couldn’t distill, what would you do?

Well, I could dust off my PhD and teach Jewish Studies, but at this stage of my life, I would probably go into politics; most likely Jewish politics, perhaps with the World Jewish Congress, for which I am already a volunteer.

8. What’s your favorite Jewish thing to do (or how do you Jew?) in Chicago?

We have Shabbat with my parents most weeks, which is wonderful. As for Chicago, we are obsessed with Milts BBQ! Talk about amazing food, and kosher too! Pretty keen on their KOVAL cocktails as well.

Online dating has evolved at a remarkable rate over the past decade. What was once a taboo “last resort” for singles has come close to the only way to date in your 20s (and as I’m learning, Tinder is becoming quite popular as well with the 30s and 40s crowd). If for some reason you’re single and not on an app, it’s time.

There has been an enormous influx of dating apps in the last three years. Some are notorious for advocating hook-ups (Tinder, Grindr), others base matches on mutual Facebook friends (Hinge), and there are even some that include specific niches (JSwipe for Jews, Bristlr for people with beard fetishes …). The number of apps alone provide more than enough opportunities for everyone to find a date, or two, or three. It’s totally possible to have your entire social life revolve around dates.

Online dating as the “new normal” isn’t the only change in 21st century dating. As our methodology of meeting potential mates has shifted, so has our mentality. Are these new perspectives and behaviors just a natural progression in the direction of the modern social environment? Or are they hindering our ability to find love?

Emphasis on volume, not value

Modern dating is like eating at a Chinese buffet and being uncomfortably full afterward (we’re talking pants-unbuttoning status). If you approach it the wrong way, online dating can be an exhausting experience characterized by overindulgence and burnout.

Imagine it this way: Instead of filling your plate with only your favorite dish – let’s say General Tsao’s Chicken, for example, you feel the need to take a little bit of everything. Dishes you know you probably won’t like still end up on your plate because you know you can always throw it away or eat one of the 50 other options.

As with most Chinese buffets, dating apps offer too many people to date. (Who knew that would ever become an issue?) Any living, breathing human within a 25-mile radius could be a Tinder match (and they might not even be a human —you never know).  Online dating is a numbers game based on dumb luck. For every seven servings of chicken fried rice, Mongolian beef or crab Rangoon,  for example, just one might have be of above-average quality. Similarly, for every seven dates you go on, only one might lead to a second. Dating multiple people simultaneously can quickly become addicting due to the unmatched ego boost, with little risk involved.

The “quantity over quality” mentality does have a downside. As a colleague once confided to me, he was “spread too thin” and was continuing to date people he didn’t even like. This lack of focus can also lead us to do less-than-classy things, like checking a dating app while on another date, or texting the wrong person something that is obviously meant for somebody else.

If the end goal is to date someone exclusively (and I know it isn’t the case for everyone), is blowing through all of your matches really the smartest strategy? Is being wheel-barrowed out of a Chinese buffet worth it? Feeling wanted by so many people has its perks, but it doesn’t last forever.

Continuum of Catfishing

In 2015, phone calls are few and far between, so texting prior to a first date can determine whether the event actually occurs. Texting can be thrilling – your heart beats a little bit faster when their name lights up your phone or their typing bubbles appear. You start to believe the two of you have chemistry and you have a lot to talk about. You laugh at their jokes. You can tell they get your sarcasm. But what you can easily forget is that you are communicating through a computer. You’re basically on Joaquin Phoenix’s level in the movie Her, (okay, so that’s being a little dramatic). You’re not talking to them. You’re typing.

Truthfully, you really don’t know if you’ll have chemistry or be able to hold a conversation with someone until you’ve met them. Even then, chemistry can take time to build. I’ve been super excited to meet somebody based on texting conversations and have had nothing to talk about with them on the actual date.  I’ve also been on dates where I’ve barely spoken to the person beforehand and had a fantastic time. Assumptions are rarely accurate; we’re all merely sketches of ourselves behind our smartphones.

To prevent shellshock, minimize the texting foreplay, get off your phone and just meet up with the person. You’ll have more to talk about anyway, and you’re less likely to find yourself on an episode of Catfish – although, who wouldn’t want to meet Nev Shulman?

Excessive Transparency

Dating apps have provided us with the ability to easily stalk, overanalyze, and ultimately torture ourselves by knowing too much in the early stages of dating. We can see when a person is active, and if they haven’t responded to a text or message since they’ve last logged on. Anxiety ensues. While online dating can be easier for the person being rejected, because information and online activity is so transparent, it’s much easier to get upset over something trivial and meaningless.

Online dating not only provides digital transparency, but also a more liberal platform for discussion about casual dating. For example, there has long been general consensus that online dating (and dating in general) can involve going out with multiple people at the same time. Over the summer, I went out with two guys who separately mentioned to me that they a) had another date that Friday evening or b) were seeing other women. I thought the first guy was just a rude human being, but when it happened a second time, I realized it was part of the new dating phenomenon.

Has dating become so transparent that literally nothing is off limits? If you can know a person’s full name, where they work and what their favorite craft beer is before meeting them, shouldn’t you also be comfortable with knowing about the other people they’re dating?

Regardless of your stage in the game, talking about your upcoming dates while on a date isn’t tasteful. If you and your date have a conversation about becoming monogamous, it’s completely appropriate to discuss if there are additional people in the mix, or if you’re in an open relationship, but otherwise, lips are best zipped.

---

The way online dating has affected the way we think is fascinating, but what’s even more interesting is how we behave in response. As the dating game continues to evolve, and our batches of matches continue to grow, my questions still linger: is the grass always greener? Have we cast our nets too wide? Would a prix-fixe menu have been a better choice than the buffet?

Rachel Krasnow is a communications professional working for a global healthcare consulting firm in Washington, D.C. A Midwest native, she graduated from Indiana University-Bloomington in 2012 with a dual degree in Journalism and Spanish. In her free time, Rachel enjoys traveling, eating, dancing, blogging and watching documentaries.  

Your bar/bat mitzvah was the best of times and the worst of times – and definitely the most embarrassing of times. But not when you were 12 or 13. Back then, it was the totally most awesome of times – awkward body issues aside.

In honor of Back from Birthright Israel’s annual Bar Mitzvah Bash, we thought we’d celebrate the best throwbacks to the social events that dominated our middle school years.

1. You were greeted by relatives you didn’t even know existed

2. Your party had the coolest theme ever … which is now totally embarrassing

3. You had your picture taken “reading” the Torah

4. Your speech was SO smart and funny, especially that joke about your sibling putting up with all your Hebrew chanting

5. You asked all your relatives and your BFFs to come light a candle with you

6. You fulfilled your 13-year lifelong dream of being hoisted up in a chair

7. Everyone watched an unnecessarily long montage of your life that included naked baby pictures

8. You strategically planned out who all your Snowball partners would be

9. You did a choreographed dance with the DJ’s backup dancers that brought down the house

10. The boys were “flirting” with these backup dancers for your entire party

^{Credit: Solepowerproductions.com}

11. At one point, everyone felt hot hot hot

12. You and your friends wore a fabulous combination of hats, sweatpants, shades, socks and inflatable instruments

^{Credit: Everythingdjs.com}
 

13. You munched on mozzarella sticks and chicken tenders and washed it down with an endless stream of kiddie cocktail, followed by a candy buffet

14. You were a dance master at the “Macarena,” “Cotton-Eyed Joe” and “Cha Cha Slide”

15. You stood in a circle and sang “That’s What Friends are For”

^{Credit: Partyperfectorlando.com}
 

16. You went home and immediately opened all your envelopes and presents

17. And were frustrated when you learned what a savings bond was

18. You became a “man” or “woman” and your life changed forever

^{Chaplain Lt. Emily Rosenzweig}

Lieutenant Emily Rosenzweig knew she wanted to be a rabbi from a young age growing up in Mount Vernon, N.Y.

After her rabbinical ordination, she headed out to Columbus, Oh., where she served as an assistant rabbi and director of education at a Reform congregation for five years.

As much as she loved the congregants, she felt like the business of what it takes to run a modern synagogue consumed her time. Her world grew smaller, and she felt isolated from the non-Jewish world that she had always connected to in the past.

She was yearning for something different—but she didn’t quite know what. Then, a series of events in her life converged, leading her to change her course.

First, she was paying close attention to the war abroad. “All the news coming out of Iraq and Afghanistan, as well as the news on the home front about what war was doing to our men and women, tugged at my soul,” she said.

Around that time, she saw a TV movie called Taking Chance, based on a true story. Rabbi Rosenzweig related to the main character, a Marine Corps officer, played by Kevin Bacon, who felt unfulfilled pushing papers back home so he accompanies the body of a fallen marine home for burial.

At the same time, Rosenzweig noticed a blurb in a Jewish newsletter with a call out for new Jewish chaplains.

So she answered the call and joined the military—choosing the U.S. Navy.

When she joined, she was asked how she’d feel about taking orders. “Taking orders from people? I worked with the [synagogue’s] sisterhood so that’s no problem,” joked Rosenzweig, who resides in Evanston with her husband.

And with that, she was on her way. In 2012, she completed basic training in Rhode Island followed by Navy chaplaincy training in South Carolina.

The chaplains she trained with represented 12 branches of various religions, 20 people total, including three women. Rosenzweig says although she recognizes a different leadership style exhibited by male versus female colleagues—similar to the differences she saw between the genders in the rabbinate—she has felt very little gender discrimination as a chaplain.

In April of 2012, she was stationed at Naval Station Great Lakes, the U.S. Navy’s only boot camp, located in North Chicago. There are some 300 Jewish recruits at Great Lakes, out of approximately 36,000 total recruits.

A chaplain’s chief role centers around caring for the recruits. She or he focuses less on the daily activities of the military, and more on the spiritual needs and comfort of the men and women serving in uniform.

The challenge lies in meeting the spiritual needs of all recruits—no matter what religion they identify with. How do you make the spiritual component universal enough that everyone feels their spiritual needs are met, but particular enough that the person delivering the prayer is comfortable with it?

No matter what one believes, comfort is a universal concept. “I can’t pretend to be the Muslim chaplain because I’m not a Muslim chaplain,” Rosenzweig said. “I’m the Jewish chaplain who can speak with a Muslim sailor about the death of a loved one because compassion is compassion is compassion.”

Rabbi David Bauman, an Orthodox rabbi, is the only other Jewish chaplain stationed at Great Lakes. He and Rosenzweig work closely with one another and offer options for two different religious services, coordinated by the Chicago Board of Rabbis, out of the same space, and they chant from the same prayer book.

Rosenzweig’s tour at Great Lakes ends in July; up next, she’ll be stationed in Hawaii, where she’ll work with a marine battalion.

She wants to dispel the myth that Jews don’t serve in the military. In fact, 1 percent of the U.S. armed forces is Jewish, some practicing Jews, while others not. “Jews have served in every major conflict in American history,” she said. “The history of Jews in the military is as long as the military.”

Her true callings she says, is to share the lessons of the Torah—whether it’s to congregants from a pulpit or to sailors in need of spiritual sustenance. “To see somebody find meaning or relevance in the Jewish tradition, whether or not it’s their tradition,” she said, “is what I was meant to do.”

I went on Birthright the summer of 2013 because I didn’t get the advertising internship I applied for. What I could never have predicted was bawling tears of joy in the middle of the mikvah (ritual bath) in Safed, climbing Masada with a sprained ankle, or announcing I wanted to live in Israel the third day of my trip. What started out as a bet with my staff member turned into me picking up my life and spending five of the most transformative months in Tel Aviv.

As a hopeless romantic at heart, I started my journey to Israel with a boy. We were longtime friends who never gave a relationship a chance. When I was 21, I met a nice Jewish boy in Reno, Nev. That summer he went on Birthright and came back saying he decided to join the Israel Defense Forces and was moving to Israel in two months. I couldn’t understand how one 10-day trip could inspire someone to make such a huge decision. That is until I went myself.

Growing up in the music and theater community, I always considered myself a creative and intuitive person. So it came as no surprise that the mystical city of Safed communicated with my soul. I knew in that moment that my time in Israel was not close to being done. Right when I got back to Reno, I called the IDF boy I had still kept in touch with for three years. He was visiting Reno and after a few dates we decided to give the relationship a shot—in Israel!

I heard about Masa Israel while on the Birthright trip and after speaking with an advisor over the phone, I decided to take a five month internship in Tel Aviv. I could not wait to start my journey despite my family being nervous about my upcoming adventure. “Don’t do this for a boy,” my family would say but I was convinced there were so many driving forces for me to go.

Two months before my journey, the relationship ended and I had to muster the courage to go across the world completely on my own. Thus began the experience that made me who I am today.

When I arrived in Israel I was greeted by a truly international welcome. Every day made me appreciate what I had and nothing touched my heart like working with the incredible team associated with the documentary film Sounds of Torture. This inspiring film focused on Eritrean asylum seekers who make their way through the Sinai desert only to get kidnapped at the Egyptian Israeli border. They are put into torture camps where they are physically beaten while calling come requesting large sums of money for their release. Just interacting with these brave souls made all my petty issues seem so insignificant. All they wanted was the simple thing I took for granted every day—freedom. Freedom to live, work, and be safe.

Israel started as a step in my relationship. Even though I ended up going alone, I never felt lonely. When I didn’t have a place to stay, I was welcomed into a stranger’s home like family. When I struggled to find a coffee shop, a man personally walked me there walking a mile out of his way. And when a man trying to start a new life was scared for his wife’s health, a community got together to provide her with medicine and a safe place to heal. What I realized was it gave Jewish people a true look into what it means to belong to a Jewish community. I will be forever grateful to Birthright, Masa Israel, and the IDF boy for changing my life.

Masa Israel Journey is the umbrella for 5-12 month programs including gap year, study abroad, and post college internships and volunteer placements. The programs are specifically designed to give each individual an immersive experience complete with interactions in the local communities, intensive Hebrew immersion ulpan, and trips all over the country. If you know anyone interested in participating on a Masa Israel program or want to find out more information go to www.masaisrael.org or email Tovah Goodman, the Chicago representative at tovahgoodman@juf.org.

Tovah Goodman is Engagement Associate for Israel Initiatives for the Jewish United Fund/Jewish Federation of Metropolitan Chicago.

As a fan of the Netflix original series Orange is the New Black, I jumped at the chance to talk with Piper Kerman and learn more about the real story of the woman whose experiences and bestselling memoir of the same name inspired the show.

In her book Orange is the New Black: My Year in a Woman's Prison (Spiegel & Grau), Kerman recounts the year (2004-2005) she spent in the Danbury Correctional Facility for a crime she had committed 10 years prior—delivering a suitcase of drug money. With the support of her loving family and fiancé and the friendships of women she meets in prison, Kerman makes it through her sentence and leaves a prison reform activist and with an incredible story to tell.

The show, adapted by Jenji Kohan into an Emmy- and Peabody Award-winning original series for Netflix, is currently nominated for a Golden Globe in the comedy category. 

Kerman, who lives in New York with her family, works in public interest communications, serves on the board of the Women's Prison Association, and delivers lectures to students, women's groups, and others on the issues of justice reform—will be visiting Chicago this month to speak at a JUF's Young Women's Board event. In advance of her visit, she spoke to Oy!Chicago about how faith played a role in her time in prison, what she thinks about the show, and what's next for her: 

Oy!Chicago: Why did you decide to write your story of your time in prison? What were you hoping your readers would take away from your experiences?

Piper Kerman: I really think that female prisoners, women in prison or jail in this country, are very emblematic of the kind of people we have chosen to incarcerate in the last 30 years that we never would have incarcerated before. People who have committed crimes who are not violent or people who have committed sometimes very low-level crimes, that's pretty typical of women in prison. And so I think that's important because the US has grown to have the biggest prison population in human history. No society has ever incarcerated so many of its citizens as we now choose to do. And that's worth a look and that's worth discussion and the lens of the female experience is a particularly unique way of looking at that.

How do you think you've changed people's perception of what life in prison is like?

First and foremost when we think of prisons or prisoners, we don't typically think of women first. So the very fact of my own story and who the book deals with confronts our assumptions about prisons and about prisoners. What I simply tried to do in the book was talk about who is really in prison in this country, what are the real reasons they are there, what are the pathways that people follow into prison and what really happens to people behind the walls of the jail because that is a world that is very intentionally hidden away from the public view so of course people are in fact very curious about it.

There are many mentions of faith throughout your book.  You say that your time in prison made you less skeptical about faith and also that in some cases it helped the women in Danbury see beyond themselves and focus on what they had to give. Tell us more about your personal experience with faith and the role of faith in prison.

Faith definitely plays a big part in the experience of incarceration—I think that's true for both men and women. A prison is a place where you see a lot of people relying on their faith as something that helps them get through what is a very difficult experience. In prison, people are forced to deal with one another, with people of different faiths. Because prison is of course exceptionally close quarters, you don't have any choice about who you'll be coexisting with and you see some interesting things play out in that realm. I think that's a really important and fundamental facet of the experience of incarceration.

I can tell you that in Season 3 of the show, an exploration of faith is an important part of the story line.

It seems like you made a lot of incredible friendships during your time in prison that helped you through your time.

I was very lucky I was able to afford really stellar representation.  I was able to afford a private attorney who spent a lot of time on my case and was a great lawyer—I'm so grateful to him. His last piece of advice to me when I was going to be sent to prison was 'don't make any friends, Piper.' And I think that was well-intentioned advice, but actually I don't know how you could possibly survive prison without friends. I don't know that anyone gets sent off to prison with the expectation that they're going to forge these very powerful friendships but that is what happens. I think that's an essential part of surviving the crucible of incarceration. Those women are so important to me and many of them are still part of my life today and I'm very grateful to them.

How does it feel to watch your story, though fictionalized, play out through the show. Do people confuse the show with your reality?

That may be but that doesn't really matter much to me. I think that Jenji Kohan has done a really phenomenal job—she is a brilliant woman and [it's] a very smart adaptation. I sometimes say that Jenji takes the book, she puts it into a blender, she puts a lot of other ingredients into the blender and then she pushes liquefy and I'm absolutely fine with that. [The character of] Piper Chapman is really a combination of Jenji's writing and Taylor Schilling's acting and I don't watch that character and think oh that's me, they're getting it wrong or they're getting it right. I watch it obviously with a different eye than most viewers, but still I'm really enjoying Jenji's adaptation.

Did you ever expect your book and then the show to take off as they have? Why do you think it is that your story is so engaging for people?

I think that every writer fantasizes success—you'd literally never finish a book if you didn't. But that said, I could never have imagined that all the things that have come to pass would happen. I think in a very simple way that the book and my own story offer people a way into trying to understand the question of mass incarceration, the question of why does America have so many prisoners, why do we put so many more people in prison than any other society in the world. That's an important question, for all people, particularly people of conscience. 

I'm sure you spend a lot of time talking about that year in prison. Tell us what you've been up to since then.

I'm very fortunate because I get to do the work that is important to me, and that's been true for many years before the book came out. I've done public interest communications work ever since I came home from prison and I'm really grateful for that. And the opportunities to talk to women's groups and to students on campus and to various and sundry other people in the community who are curious about these issues is really rewarding because these issues deserve a really good long consideration.

What's next for you?

I have a new book project which I will be beginning in the new year and I can't say much more about it. But it will remain focused on the criminal justice system and is set in the Midwest.

JUF's Young Women's Board Valor 2015 event featuring an evening with Piper Kerman, will be held Jan. 29 at The Art Center Highland Park. A $750 minimum individual women's contribution to the 2015 JUF Annual Campaign is required to attend. Couvert - $50. For more information or to register online visit www.juf.org/ywbvalor.